My middle daughter, Sami, called me today because she was feeling embarrassed. She’s been laid off from her job and her wonderful boss is trying to help her find a temporary position.
However, Sami doesn’t drive and she walked to work. Any temporary job would be farther away from where she lived and taking an Uber twice a day wasn’t in her budget.
I asked her why she was embarrassed and she replied: “I don’t like having to ask for help for something that I should be able to do for myself.”
I could see her eyes shining as she spoke to me via video. She works so hard to be responsible and for now, she has a gap between what she has and what she needs. I could see her sadness shining in her eyes.
Maybe your eyes are shining with a few tears, too. The virus crisis has created a scary gap in your life between what you have and what you need…
You’ve got more month than money…
You have worry up to your eyeballs and you need peace…
You have other problems other than the virus crisis and you NEED help keeping yourself together!
We can’t remind ourselves of this enough: It’s okay for us to grieve the loss of the way that our life used to be. If you’ve got a scary gap that’s on your mind 24/7, don’t beat yourself up.
Sometimes, gaps and crisis reveal that we might be infected with another kind of virus, a spiritually-deadly virus. It’s called the “I-can-take-care-of-myself” infection also known as pride.
For years, I’d rather die than admit that I needed help, especially when it came to finances or with my kids.
I had an ah-ha moment while I was writing my new Surrendered Bible Study this summer.
As I studied Jesus’ 40-days in the wilderness, Matthew 4:11 changed how I thought about asking for help.
Then the devil left him, and angels came and attended him.
After three tough temptations, Jesus tells Satan to get away from him and the angels show up to attend to Jesus. Imagine if the angels of showed up and Jesus said, “Nah. I’m good. I’m sure that you angels have other people who need help. I can take care of myself.”
How often do we say that? Most people who offer to help us are doing so because they want to help. When we offer to help someone, we don’t think less of them, do we?
Here’s the ah-ha moment that I had: Jesus said “yes” to help when it was offered.
After 40 days of hunger, spiritual tension, and demonic attack, Jesus allowed the angels to show up and care for him. He could have seen to His own needs, but Jesus was humble enough to allow the angels to give, bring, and provide.
Here are three takeaways that I want you to think about today if you have been struggling to ask for help:
1. You have permission to ask for help.
You may have grown up in a family that didn’t believe in asking others for help. I need to speak some truth to you: that is an attitude centered in dangerous pride. It’s time to reject that lie and embrace truth:
If Jesus accepted help, you can, too. Keep telling yourself that.
Ask yourself if you need physical help, spiritual help, emotional help, or financial help. Keep giving yourself permission to ask for help until you find the right help that you need.
2. You need to ask for help when you feel the 3 H’s: hurt, hopeless, or helpless.
Don’t let pride or even Satan whisper that you can figure it out or that you should be ashamed. Stomp on those whispers in Jesus’ name!
We’ve all seen people in our lives that we love refuse to get the help that they needed. The right people will not judge you. They will offer you love and compassion.
If you need words to ask for help, you can use these three powerful words: “I need help.”
3. God takes care of His children at all times, especially hard times.
I’m clinging to #3 right now during the virus crisis. Like many of you, I’ve been deeply affected by the crisis financially. But, I know that God will be enough for whatever it is that I will need.
If you have a gap in any area of your life, that’s where God wants to fill up that space with MORE of Him.
QUESTION: When do you struggle with asking for help?
Thank you! Thank you for all you do!
Hi Kimmi, Thank you for sharing your comment. Blessings and be well.
This hits the mark with me. I’ve always felt I should be able to get by without asking for help. Even at work, I have a hard time asking managers how to do something. Seeing clearly that Jesus accepted help puts it in a whole new light. Thank you!
Hi Linda, thank you for sharing your comment. I know that many women feel the same way as you. I’m glad that you’ve been inspired by the example that Jesus sets for us.
Thank you Barb for these encouraging words! Have a beautiful day!
Hi Mae, I’m so glad that you were encouraged. Thank you for sharing your comment. Have a beautiful day!