So, you and you friend have gotten into a fight. What now?
A few years ago, I hurt a friend. It wasn’t on purpose. There was a conflict between my friend and another person. I thought that I was being helpful – a bridge-builder per se. I stuck my nosy nose into the situation and gave my worthless two cents. The next day, my girlfriend called in tears to let me know that my well-meaning words put her in an awful position. I felt awful. I’d hurt my friend.
Have you ever been hurt by a friend? Have you ever been the one to hurt a friend’s feelings? No matter which side you find yourself on, it’s painful all the way around!
After last week’s Better Together episode with my guest, Natalie Chambers Snapp, I heard from many women who’ve dealt with friendship break-ups, heartache, betrayal and pain. It’s so hard sometimes!
I love how Natalie shared her “PEG System” to help her think through friendship conflict. Here’s an explanation and something that you can consider if you have a friendship that is broken right now:
Pray – Instead of taking our pain to friends, take your pain to God and ask for clarity on what’s going on.
Examine – Ask yourself tough questions like:
- What’s my role in this conflict?
- Can I be with my friend in the future without replaying the hurt?
- Do I need to talk to her about the problem OR is this a “me” issue that I need to work out with God?
Go Straight to that Person – Direct dialogue, but Natalie lists a few conditions in the podcast.
This podcast is jam-packed with solid Biblical insight about not only friendships, but Natalie challenges our hearts to realize where God needs to work within us.
GIVEAWAY: I’m giving away a copy of Natalie’s NEW Becoming Heart Sisters Bible study! It’s available at Christian retailers nationwide, but you can enter to win a copy by clicking here and leaving a comment on last week’s blog page. Winner will be drawn on June 5.
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Author Natalie Chambers Snapp uses her own and others’ stories of successes and failures to illustrate what she has learned about girlfriend relationships. Healthy boundaries, honesty, tact, sharing, and agape love all play a part in being and maintaining a circle of close confidants. She also deals with the inevitable challenges that face many relationships including how to handle conflict; life changes like a new baby, move or divorce; and when it is right to “break-up” with your friend.