Hi friends,

We’re coming to the end of our series on praying for loved ones. Next week is the final week. Last week, I heard from so, so many of you. Your notes and reflections blessed me. I’m praising God for how He used last week’s Happy Monday to remind you that YOU are precious to Him. If I haven’t responded to your email yet, stay tuned.

Let’s jump back into Jesus’ teaching on the prodigal son in Luke 15. Today’s devotion covers my favorite part of Jesus’ story. If you’re new to the series, you can read the previous week’s devotion at the end of this email, but for now, let’s read Luke 15:17-19 NLT:

When he finally came to his senses, he said to himself, “At home even the hired servants have food enough to spare, and here I am dying of hunger. I will go home to my father and say, ‘Father, I have sinned against both heaven and you, and I am no longer worthy of being called your son. Please take me on as a hired servant.’” -Luke 15:17-19 NLT

If you use holy imagination, can you see the son sitting on a mud splattered fence, tossing pods into the muddy, smelly pig pen? Can you smell his dirty clothes and hear his stomach rumbling? After living recklessly and doing whatever he wanted, the son now sits in his reality.

I love this part of the story because the son makes the decision to repent on his own. He alone must recognize his need for God and make the decision to change. Repentance means to change one’s mind and to go in a different direction. This insight elevates something we must remember when praying for our loved ones. When someone is far from God, their decision to return to God is up to them, not us.

Ultimately, we can’t want more for someone than what they want for themselves.

The good news is that we can “help” in these four ways, even though we are not in charge of changing them.

1. Let Go of Acting Like Holy Spirit Jr. in Their Lives

Friend, God doesn’t need you to run around after an unsaved loved or prodigal nagging or with scare tactics. God is not anxious about your loved one, so you don’t need to be. Your goal is to become a non anxious presence around them that exudes trust in God, your own fully alive faith, and unconditional love for your unsaved loved one or prodigal.

What can you do? Turn your worry words and nagging words into praying words.

2. Let Them Experience the Natural Consequences of Their Decisions

We don’t know what prompted the son in Jesus’ story to come back to himself, but I like how Pastor David Guzik explains the first verse. “In his misery, the prodigal son was finally able to think clearly.” The son finally felt the sum total of his wild and reckless choices. That was the aha moment he needed to turn back toward God.

Our takeaway here is this: Sometimes, we must let people experience the natural consequences of their decisions. This is not a punishment. You are giving them the gift of experiencing their reality.

You are in charge of not panicking when you see problems. Pray for them, but also pray for yourself. Ask God if He is specifically calling you to get involved or if He needs you to let Him do the work that only He can do.

I know there are complicated situations involving mental health, grandkids, and more. But for the most part, many of us panic and then try to fix things when we see our adult loved ones struggling after poor decisions. Instead of swooping in, what if you left room for them to experience their need for God?

You may need to get comfortable with being uncomfortable and not saving them. Most of us needed to experience big problems or coming to the end of ourselves to turn to God. Don’t rob them of the same opportunity.

3. Pray for Them to Reach Up to God Instead of Praying for Their Rock Bottom

I’ve heard many people pray for a wayward person to hit rock bottom. We think rock bottom means they will have to come back to God.

I used to pray for my former addicted spouse to hit rock bottom. I figured that when life was painful enough, he’d change. But I learned something painful. When someone hits rock bottom, they still have a choice. They can call on God for help, or they may dig out a shovel and dig themselves in deeper.

Some of us have witnessed our unsaved loved ones or prodigals fall into terrible situations. We’ve seen them get arrested, lose jobs, or experience financial disaster. Just when we think they’ve had enough to finally turn toward God, they keep going down the destructive path.

Rather than praying for someone to hit rock bottom, pray for them to reach out to God before they hit bottom. Speak God’s promises over them instead of asking God to send them into more pain or loss.

4. Finally, Keep the Love Lane Open and Forgive Them If Needed

You never know the day when your loved one will be ready to come back to God. Be ready. Stay ready. Pray for God to give you the unconditional love that He has given you.

Often, our prodigals break our hearts because of what they’ve said or done. You may need to forgive them for the heartache you’ve experienced along the way. You may need to grieve the picture you had in your head of what you thought life would look like. This is the work God calls you to do while He is working in their lives.

I’D LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU! Did today’s devotion encourage you or help you change direction in your prayer strategy for your unsaved loved one or prodigal. Share your reflection with me or where you sensed God prompting you to approach prayer differently.