by Barb Roose | Jan 28, 2016 | Reflections, Women's Topics
Barbie’s back with a new look and style. But will it make a difference?
As a kid, my friend knew never to call me “Barbie.” In fact, anyone who did call me by that horrible name got a push or a shove in reply. While I shared a similar name to the celebrated doll, I spent my childhood burdened by the fact that I didn’t look anything like the Barbie dolls I played with each day.
I’ve lived my life in the shadow of that manufactured creature known for her flawless perfection and radiant beauty. Little girls everywhere adored the 11 ½” plastic doll with an creamy white skin, anatomically impossible skinny waist, long blonde hair, freakishly long eye lashes and an enviable arched foot. With her perfect smile and innocent gaze, Barbie taunted me during my childhood.
As an adult, I know that just because I share a name with Barbie, that doesn’t mean that I should look like her. But, decades ago, that little brown-skinned me with pop-bottle glasses and two-large front teeth didn’t know any better. So, I would stare at my perfect, blond Barbie doll and feel less than.
On January 28 Mattel released a new line of Barbie’s with different body types and sizes. Which one would you choose? photo credit: mashable.com
During playtime, my cousins and I would dress our Barbie dolls in those luxurious, shiny gowns with the Velcro zippers and plastic stiletto heels. We dreamed that our superfly-looking dolls had high-paying jobs and lived in the palatial Barbie Mansion. Our Barbies did have Ken for a husband, but we didn’t actually have the money to buy Ken, so we always said that he was out of town.
Barbara, you don’t look like Barbie…
At some point while we played, one of the cousins or friends would point out the obvious: I didn’t look like Barbie, even though my name was Barbara. And I would nod my head and agree. I was a little, girl with a big name who didn’t look anything like the beautiful doll resting in her hand.
So, a particular narrative began to take shape in my little girl mind: “Since I don’t look like the pretty Barbie dolls, then I cannot be pretty. If I am not pretty, then I should not dream of all of the things that pretty little girls should dream about.”
For years, I pretended not to care about the fact that I wasn’t pretty because I didn’t look like those Barbie dolls. I decided to be smart instead. And I was. I wore my glasses and I made good grades.
But, I wanted to feel beautiful. Like Barbie.
Recently, Mattel announced the biggest change in Barbie’s 57-year history. After a half-century of predominately blond-hair, blue eye dolls, Barbie’s back…it might even be appropriate to say that in some cases, Barbie’s got back.
I found a Barbie that looked like me…not really, but she looks a lot more like me than my childhood Barbie’s ever did. photo credit: mashable.com
Now, Barbie will come with three different body types: petite, tall and curvy. Not only that, but curvy Barbie will truly be curvy with a little tummy in the front and a little junk in the trunk. And, when you see the side-by-side comparison of original Barbie and curvy Barbie, it’s shocking!
But, will it actually translate as a positive step to improving little girls’ self-image? What happens when a little girl has a skinny Barbie and a curvy Barbie, yet only has clothes for skinny Barbie? Mattel is actually setting up a call line to help parents navigate some of the new complexities of dressing curvy Barbie. Sometimes, her clothes don’t slide easily over her hips and thighs. Talk about art imitating life!
There are concerns that “curvy” Barbie might end up being branded as “fat” Barbie, creating some potentially awkward moments at Christmas or at birthday parties. Will a little girl want to receive curvy Barbie, even if she’s a curvy little girl? It will be interesting to see how parents and Mattel navigate this issue. Is it possible that for us to teach our kids how to do this even if we haven’t figure it out yet?
Yet, for all of the questions about the new line of Barbie dolls, I applaud Mattel for doing something! While previous generations of women sort through what I like to call our “Barbie baggage,” I’m thrilled that today’s young girls have a choice about the kind of Barbie they want to play and dream with each day.
As for me, I made peace with sharing Barbie’s name years ago. In fact, I’ve learned how to embrace it and have fun with it.
These days, my social media hastag is #TallbrownBarbie.
WHAT DO YOU THINK? Do you think that the new curvy Barbie will be embraced by young girls? How would you talk with a little girl who prefers skinny or petite Barbie over curvy Barbie – or would you just let her figure it out?
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by Barb Roose | Sep 10, 2015 | Women's Topics
You hate shopping? You’re not alone!
“Getting half-naked in front of the dressing room mirror intimidates me.”
“I don’t know what looks good on me.”
“I’ll go shopping after I lose some weight.”
“I just don’t like my body.”
Are you unhappy with your current wardrobe situation? Do you have clothes in your closet with the tags still on? It’s no wonder that so many awaken to the dreaded daily question: “What am I going to wear today?” I think this is why we embrace yoga pants or sweats. We worship that stretchy material that slides over everything we hate about our size and shape. We know that those stretchy black and gray pants aren’t flattering, but when our other choices are naked or frustrated tears, we’ll choose stretchy pants every time.
This is how shopping feels sometimes, right?
Why the despair? What do we really want from our clothes, ladies? There are two things that we want from our clothes: We want our clothes to look good on us and we want our clothes to feel like us. When we get dressed, we want our clothes to feel as natural on our bodies as our skin does and our clothes should be a reflection of who we are on the inside. When that doesn’t happen, our clothes can feel like they suffocating us. No one wants to feel suffocated in her clothes.
We all face different clothing challenges. Some of you are petite. Others of you struggle with difficult proportions. Some of you lament your stick-straight profile and wish that people would stop telling you how lucky you are that you are so thin. Me? I’ve got my own issues. I’m 5’ 10” with long legs and big curves on the top and bottom. I know what it means to have clothing challenges!
Why does it matter what you wear?
Think about your favorite (non-stretchy pants) outfit? In fact, if you can, go put it on. How does wearing that outfit make you feel? You stand a little taller, right? It’s easier to smile. Your eyes shine brighter and you feel more open to giving to the world around you. You feel like your best YOU. When you put on clothes that are the proper size, flatter shape and right style, everything about who you are on the inside translates on the outside.
Don’t write off that last sentence off as superficial or shallow. It’s not shallow to realize that when we invest the time into discovering our proper size, shape and style, that we walk stronger, taller and more confident as our authentic selves.
Why it only takes me five minutes to get dressed each morning…
I’m not a fashion professional. I haven’t had any formal training, but I do know how to buy clothes that are the proper size, flattering shape and reflect my natural style. As a result, it only takes me about five minutes to get dressed each morning, including shoes and accessories. Yes, five minutes. Which is good because I’m a night person and mornings are really rough for me.
Once I get dressed, I don’t think about what I’m wearing the rest of the day. I rarely look at a mirror unless I’m shooting a video or someone tells me that I’ve got food on my shirt, which happens frequently. What I love about feeling confident after I get dressed is that I don’t feel self-conscious. Also, my mental energy isn’t depleted by lingering doubts about how I look or how people think I look. In fact, when I feel good, then I am more likely to connect with others. It’s easier to give of myself when I feel good about me.
Three Promises I Made to Myself…
Would you believe that I’ve had that blazer for over 15 years? It used to be part of a suit that I paid $79.00 on clearance. That necklace was a $30 splurge for a special event in New York City, but I’ve been able to wear it often to add a little pop to simple garments like that plain white shirt.
After years of hating to shop and feeling badly in everything I wore, I decided to live by these three clothing promises:
- I would only purchase clothing or shoes that I absolutely, positively loved.
- I would only purchase items that looked great on me. Not good, but great.
- If something in my closet didn’t fit, I would get rid of it.
These three promises have simplified one of the most complicated decisions in my life – what I wear every day. Every morning, I have a 100% chance that I will feel great in what I am wearing. My closet is blessedly uncomplicated and I avoid feeling the pressure to keep buying clothes because what I own is already enough.
InStyle’s Social Media Assistant Editor, Jennifer Davis’ black dress
These shopping promises also mean that I can shop less. I don’t need to have overflowing closets of clothes. That’s right, you don’t need lots of clothes! InStyle’s Assistant Social Media Editor, Jennifer Davis1, wore the same little black dress for five work days and no one in her fashion-conscious office noticed. She mixed different accessories and layering options and no one ever knew that she repeated the same basic dress all week. Jennifer demonstrated how looking great isn’t about having more clothes or expensive clothes, but knowing how to mix and match what’s already there.
And, when I don’t love something anymore or it stops fitting like it used to, I don’t get emotional because I have lots of other things that I love. But, I do give it away. (By the way, I do own sweatpants and there are days when I want to wear them. In fact, while writing this article, I’m wearing sweats right now!)
Some of you feel intimidated or overwhelmed at the time and effort it will take to discover what is right for you. Yes, it will take an investment of time. However, you’ll end up saving hundreds of hours of frustration at the store or in your closet in the future. Once you know what you look great in, you won’t waste time or money buying things that make you less than beautiful.
Three Practical Tips for Your Current Closet
- Try on everything in your closet. I mean everything! Don’t be emotional about it. If you can’t fit something over your knees, slip it back off quickly and move on. You must control your thoughts and don’t let your clothes become a judge of your self-worth. You are more than your clothes! You are awesome! Keep repeating that to yourself!
- Divide your clothes and shoes into in two
piles: things that fit your proper size, have a flattering shape and style and then a pile for everything else. If you aren’t sure, ask yourself: Does this look and feel like me? Do I smile when I have this on?
- Let go of everything that doesn’t look or feel like you. Trust me. You won’t be
left naked. Let it go! Box it up and donate it. If you’re about to hyperventilate at the thought of doing this, invite a friend over to help you through this process.
I really wanted to buy this sweater – especially since I had a gift card! I tried this sweater on two different occasions. It was the right size and style, but the shape just wasn’t right for my body. So, I didn’t buy. And I don’t regret it!
Four Practical Tips For When You Do Need to Shop
- Let Your Clothes Be Your Guide – Review the pile of clothes that you love. Assess the colors, sizes, shape and style. Take pictures of your favorite shirts, pants and dresses. When you recognize the clothes that look good and makes you smile, then your shopping goal is to mimic what already works for you.
- Shop by Label – Look at the labels of the clothes that you already own and love. Shop at the stores that carry those labels. When it’s time to shop, go to those stores and start with trying on those labels first. You’ll get an extra boost of confidence knowing that that you’ve experienced success with that clothing brand. It will also reduce the amount of intimidation that you face when you walk into the store and see thousands of possibilities.
- Grab three sizes! We’ve got to make peace with the fact that clothing sizes aren’t consistent. You’ve just got to make peace with that. When I find an item, I grab the size that I think I wear as well as one size smaller and bigger. I try on all three without looking at the size. Then, I pick the one that fits best and makes me feel great about how I look! The feeling that I get from how I look that garment is much more satisfying than any shame or sadness over the number on the tag. No one knows what size you are unless you tell them, BUT they will notice if your clothes are too big or way too small.
- Listen to people – When you receive a compliment on an outfit, pay attention! Don’t brush off compliments or diminish them! Look that wonderful person in the eye and thank them. Compliments mean that you are moving about the world as your truest self and that’s a good thing!
I’d love your feedback! Did you try any of these clothing tips? How did you get through the process? Did you buy anything new? If so, let us see it!
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Source: http://news.instyle.com/2014/12/30/i-tried-it-i-wore-the-same-little-black-dress-for-a-week/
