Hi friends, I usually like to post something inspirational or encouraging. But, not today. Today, I just want to share four things that gross me out. Here they are:
1. Hotdog chunks with spaghetti
This is the photo that started it all. I saw this on Facebook tonight and gagged. I didn’t almost gag. I gagged.
The only reason I’m posting this photo is just so that you can see what I am talking about. My apologies to every mother whose pinned this culinary fail, but you can do better than this. Com’on, Mom, resist.
First of all, hot dogs and spaghetti don’t go together. I’m not sure why I even need to explain this. There’s no amount of ketchup that can overcome this ill-conceived combination. Look at this picture – it looks like the hotdogs are hemorrhaging noodles like some kind of alien birth. Or worms. Aaggghhh!!! Hot dogs and spaghetti don’t go together, people. Yikes!
2. Touching raw meat with my hands
I’m a wimp. I’ll admit it. As a fan of historical literature, I give thanks to God that He allowed me to be born in the 1970’s. And in the suburbs. If I would have been born 100 years before, I would have been beaten or sold the first time they sent me out to kill a chicken for dinner. “Com’ on Barb, you would’ve killed that chicken and plucked its feathers to survive.” Nope. I can tell you that I wouldn’t have. Post-Civil War Barbie would have died of starvation by the side of the road. I know it doesn’t make sense. (Remember, I’m the same girl who jumped out of an airplane to avoid touching a tarantula.)
I love meat. Clarification: I love most kinds of meat. But, I HATE touching it. Just the thought of ground beef squishing around my fingers gives me the willies. The though of touching slithery, cold chicken flesh tempts me to go vegetarian every single time I cook. But, I lose interest in the meat-free lifestyle once dinner hits the table.
Since my family is fond of eating and I like feeding them, tongs and forks are my friends. I can use the tongs to pick up and flip the meat. Forks can be used to spear the meat and stabilize it for slicing or chunking.
We had baked chicken tonight for dinner. Those tongs came in handy. But I made sure to wash them before taking the photo.
3. Food in the bathroom
Last week was April Fools’ Day. A clever person in our office posted “Watch out for the Leak” signs in our bathroom. At first, I tiptoed around the stalls, hoping to avoid whatever might be seeping across the floor. When I swung open the bathroom stall, I found the “leak”:
I laughed at the pun. It was funny and I appreciated the chuckle.
But, I couldn’t use the bathroom.
Food in the bathroom freaks me out.
Sure, I’ve finished a piece of toast as I’ve crossed into the bathroom to brush my teeth, but that’s all I can stomach. I’m a firm believer that invisible super-power poop particles are suspended in our bathroom air just waiting to land atop anything edible. I shudder to think that one of those microscopic particles could float down from the air and land on my morning yogurt or atop my buttery spread.
4. Finally, Tapioca…
It’s just gross. Looks like the backs of eyeballs clustered in a bowl. And, I’m not going to show you a picture of it. Yuck.
So, that’s it for the things that gross me out. If you were looking for something uber spiritual, stay tuned for another post this week (which means I probably need to write something). For now, I hope this post makes you smile on a Monday morning. Of course, feel free to leave a comment or share this post if you think it will make your friends smile, too.
See you soon, friends!