by Barb Roose | May 23, 2018 | Better Together Podcast
What are you missing out on if you aren’t connected with any millennials?
It’s become really easy for us to criticize the Millennial generation, those individuals born between 1981 and 1996 (according to Pew Research). How many times have you heard or maybe you referred to Millennials as “entitled” or said “they have a poor work ethic”?
My Better Together guest today is the exact opposite of the common (and untrue) stereotypes attributed to today’s Millennials. Lauren Gaskill is a speaker, author, podcaster, and entrepreneur – and she’s 25 years old. That’s right! Seriously, what were you doing at 25?
Lauren has been my friend for a long time – I’m so excited that you get to meet her. Lauren emailed me years ago because she wanted to connect with women in ministry who were farther down the road in experience and faith. But, friends, I’ve learned so much from this brilliant young woman.
Her first book, Into the Deep, comes out in November 2018 (Abingdon Press). A long-time competitive swimmer, Lauren uses water as a word picture and writes about intentionally stepping out in faith and asking Jesus to show up big in our lives. While many of us get accustomed to playing it safe, this young woman just might light a fire under your complacency as you listen to her today.
Lauren knows what it’s like to face real struggle, both in circumstances and faith. She was diagnosed with Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome years ago. It’s a connective tissue disorder that often leaves her in tremendous pain and suffering from anxiety.
“A year ago, I was in a pretty bad spot. I remember looking at my husband and saying, “‘I think that I might need to be in a psych ward.’ It was a scary place. I am so glad that my faith got me through it. The Jesus inside of me is stronger than the darkness that tries to overtake me.”
Girl, preach.
During today’s conversation, you get the chance to hear from one of the best and brightest leaders that we have, especially in the Church today.
CONVERSATION STARTERS WITH MILLENNIALS
If you feel like God wants you to invest more of your life and time into the young people at your church or in your community, here are few “conversation starters”:
- Who are the people that you admire?
- What kind of parent do you want to be?
- If you could fix any problem in the world, what would it be?
- What are some issues that older adults get crazy about that you don’t understand?
- In addition to preaching the Gospel, how else can the Church help you grow in your faith?
- How can I help you?
LINKS FROM TODAY’S PODCAST
Lauren Gaskill Website | Facebook
Ticket information – She Found Joy Tour (Fall 2018)
Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome
About the Better Together podcast…
Barb Roose is host of the Better Together podcast. She is a speaker and author with a passion to help women win at life with strength and dignity. Barb has been speaking at women’s conferences, events and retreats since 2005. She is the author of multiple books and Bible studies, including the new book Winning the Worry Battle and Bible study Joshua: Winning the Worry Battle.
Barb and her husband, Matt are the parents of three daughters, Kate, Sami, and Abbie. They love their dog, Quimby and a 9-year old rabbit that threatens to live forever. She loves Jesus, new adventures, her FitBit, chocolate peanut butter ice cream, and fabulous high heels.
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by Barb Roose | Mar 27, 2018 | Christian Living/Discipleship, Joshua & Winning the Worry Battle
By Barb Roose
For most of my adult life, I thought that being a worrier was a sign that I cared about others.
If I worried about someone that meant that I cared about their safety and happiness. So, I would devote my mental energy to identifying all of the ways that my family or friends might miss optimum happiness, hurt or kill themselves. It didn’t matter if they were thinking about trying a new hairstyle or daring to attend a college across the country, I was going to point out everything that could possibly go wrong so that they could avoid a tragedy.
But, what happens to us when we spend our time thinking about all of the things that could hurt, harm or kill the people in our lives? Eventually, our minds get stuck in that kind of worst-case scenario thinking. Did you know that 85% of what we’re afraid of happening never actually happens? So, when you’re churning all of the “what-if” scenarios about your daughter going on a missions’ trip or your son heading off to college, 85% of what you are stressing out about won’t happen.
Why do we believe that worrying is a symbol of caring for others?
If we worry about people because we care about them, then why does worry only produce negative feelings in us? I don’t know about you, but the more I allowed myself to worry, the more trapped I felt in a world of worry. Instead of feeling happiness for the people that I loved, I began to only feel fear, which opposes and tries to suffocate the power of love.
Here are three ways that worry makes us feel crazy:
1. Worry pretends to be productive.
When nothing changes, you feel crazy because you thought that by worrying you were actually doing something to make positive change happen.
2. Worry doesn’t have to work hard work to take over your mind.
Worry feels like your subscription to Netflix. It’s always available and once you begin streaming WorryFlix, you end up binge-worrying your entire life before you know it.
3. Worry produces horrible feelings that stress you out during the day and keep you up at night.
Isn’t it amazing how something in your mind makes your body respond in real ways? While you’re imagining the worst, your heart is racing and you feel real fear. Have you ever finished worrying and REAL tears were streaming down your face? And it was all in your imagination…
How worry made me feel crazy and out of control…
Seventeen years ago, my battle with worry peaked when one of my kids was struggling at school. Her teacher sent home notes and we had numerous meetings. I loved my sweet girl, but my fear over her future consumed me. Dozens of “what if” worst case scenarios drove me crazy! For weeks, I stressed out over my child’s health during the day and I paced the floor because I couldn’t sleep at night. Like Jesus said in Matthew 6:27, all of my worries didn’t add a single quality moment to my life or my child’s life.
So, what changed? I had to admit that worry was my flawed way of playing God instead of taking the time to pray to God.
Then, I had to replace those places in my mind where worry got good and comfortable with God’s Word. I had to commit myself to filling my brain with Bible verses that spoke against worry like this one:
Give all your worries and cares to God, for He cares about you.
—1 Peter 5:7
If you’ve always been a worrier, can I suggest that you either memorize this verse or type it into your cell phone. Whenever worry tries to take up space in your life, allow God to use this verse to kick that worry out of your mind and replace it with peace. Trust me, it does work! But, you’ve got to put the work into it!
Do I still worry at times? Yes! I’ll always have to fight against worry, but I don’t have to live as a worrier.
When you know how to use God’s Word to win against worry, you will wake up energized every day and excited about life because you know that God will give you victory over any worry that comes your way. Don’t waste another day of your life fighting a losing worry battle!
Don’t waste another day of your life fighting a losing worry battle!
LEAVE A COMMENT BELOW: Are you a worrier? What things do you worry about most?
About Barb Roose…
Barb loves reaching women and teaching them to win at life with God-empowered strength and dignity. She is the author of multiple books and Bible studies, including April 2018 releases, Joshua: Winning the Worry Battle (Bible study) and Winning the Worry Battle. She is the host of the Better Together Podcast and loves diving into tough topics that women want to know. Barb and her husband, Matt, are the parents of three daughters. Barb loves Jesus, travel, her FitBit, chocolate-peanut butter ice cream, and fabulous high heel shoes.
by Barb Roose | Mar 14, 2018 | Joshua & Winning the Worry Battle
By Barb Roose
Over the past 15 years, I’ve learned a lot about how to allow God to give me victory over fear and worry. I created the C.A.L.M. Technique for myself to reduce my physical distress so that I could pray. This easy-to-use tool works to slow down my heart rate, break the pattern of negative thinking, and relax my body. Then, I can invite God into my distress and ask Him to fight my battles for me. The C.A.L.M Technique isn’t just a neat idea – I use it! (I used it last week.) Recently, I had a chance to teach it to the folks at my church and that was pretty cool. Would you like to learn it?
C.A.L.M. Technique
- Count to 10 (Inhale on the number; Exhale the word MISSISSIPPI)
- Acknowledge God’s presence by saying: God, I know that You’re here with me right now.
- List – Tell God what you are afraid of or worried about
- Meditate – Keep repeating the following: God is here and He will take care of me/this.
When it comes to the counting, you will need to boss your emotions so that you can push your count to 10. Those supercharged emotions will definitely fight the technique. But, stick with it because it does work! This is one of those tools that becomes more effective the more you use it. Your body will calm down. I love this tool because it equips us to walk in the blessing of God’s promise in Joshua 1:9:
The point of this exercise is to reduce your physical distress and open up a conversation with God. I love this tool because it equips us to walk in the blessing of God’s promise in Joshua 1:9: “This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”
I don’t know what’s on your mind today. But, if you’re prone to meltdowns like me, practice the C.A.L.M. technique a few times so that you can use this tool to help you calm down during anxious times and connect with the God who promises to take care of you.
*Looking for MORE tools? Order my new book, Winning the Worry Battle releasing next month for even more practical tools to help you fight your worry battle! Click here to find out where you can order your book today!
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by Barb Roose | Oct 7, 2014 | Scripture Devotional
There are few movies that have transcended the generations. The “Wizard of Oz” is one of those movies. While my kids weren’t swept away with the same sense of awe that I experienced in my younger years, I could tell they enjoyed it just the same. Seriously, who wouldn’t enjoy the snappy, happy songs, and exciting pre-CGI moments like when mean Ms. Gulch morphed into a witch and the movie switched from black-n-white to Technicolor. It’s like a retro-thrill for us.
Each main character in the movie had a specific need and they believed that there was One who could fulfill that need:
The Scarecrow wanted a brain.
The Tin Man wanted a heart.
The Cowardly Lion wanted courage.
And Dorothy wanted to go home.
(Frankly, I think Dorothy should have been happy enough with those sparkly red shoes. Holla.)
Anywhoo, after the group sashayed down the Yellow Brick Road and crashed the gates of the Wizard’s Emerald City, they had a chance to make the big “Ask.” Yet, the Scarecrow, Tin Man and Cowardly Lion all wimped out, instead pushing Dorothy to the forefront to present their needs.
For all of their intent to obtain their heart’s desire, the characters let fear and worry strip away their opportunity to make the “ask.”
And we do, too. Too often, we pass on making the “ask.”
A few days ago, I sat in the bed with a deep pit in my stomach – a deep pit filled to the brim with acidic worry. It wasn’t a life or death situation, but something serious enough for a deep, dark crater to open in the center of my being and fill with burning, bubbly anxiety and fear. The pit seemed to whisper “doom and gloom” over and over again. And, the longer I felt worried, the bigger the pit seemed to get.
You know the feeling?
Luckily, I realized that the pit didn’t own me. I remembered that I didn’t have to listen to the lies from that pit.
Neither do you. We don’t have to let it grow out of control. Here’s some encouragement for you today:
Give all of your worries and cares to God for he cares for you. -1 Peter 5:7
We give our worries to God when we pray. Prayer is talking to God. You don’t need fancy words. My friends, prayer is the only way to combat that horrible doom feeling inside. Prayer fills in the pit. But, you can’t pawn this off on someone else. You have to pray. Even if you are praying for someone else and you are afraid, only you can give your worries to God.
How can you do this today?
1. What specifically are you worried about? Clarify your thoughts as well as your feelings.
2. Tell God about it. Use regular words. Be honest. If you haven’t prayed in awhile, today’s a good day to start!
3. God’s not your magical genie and prayer isn’t an “Easy Button.” The purpose of prayer is to connect yourself to God’s heart and eliminate worry, not to have God give you exactly what you want. The Bible tells us to boldly make our requests known to God, but trust in God’s sovereignty for the outcome.
4. Once you give your fears, worries or anxieties over to God, don’t try to take them back!
Thanks for reading today! What do you worry about? Do you struggle with praying? Tell us about your experience – you can leave a comment here or on my Facebook page. Also, if you think that others would find this post helpful, I’d love you to share it with them. God bless! Barb
by Barb Roose | Jul 24, 2013 | Christian Living/Discipleship
It was exactly a year ago that I woke up on my 40th birthday in a really bad mood.
I hated turning 40. Hated it. Even saying the words, “I’m 40” seemed to stick in my throat. Still does…
In the weeks leading up to my birthday last year, I sensed the likelihood of a meltdown, so I wisely planned a distraction: a partial kitchen remodel. Since I’m not super-handy, I had figured driving back and forth to Home Depot that week would keep me too busy to think about the Big 4-0.
On the morning of my July 24th birthday, I had planned to start painting the cabinet doors. As I mixed paint at 8:15am that morning, I groused to God about reaching this dreaded female milestone. Yet, I also felt guilty for being ungrateful. Afterall, I was alive, right? As I prepped the cabinets, I began to obsess (maybe even panic…) about what might be next in my life. And, what if there wasn’t a “next”? That thought terrified me. I begged God to help me shake off the “40-funk” that was settling into my heart.
At 8:30am, the phone rang. Then, everything changed:
“Barb, you need to meet Life Flight at St. V’s. Your sister-in-law and niece are headed there. They’ve been in an accident. Someone has died, but we don’t know who or in which car.”
Luckily, the hospital’s location is three minutes from my house and I was there within 10 minutes of the phone call. After waiting, I found out that my sister-in-law was alive and my niece was unconscious and in critical condition. Then, sadly, I learned that one of the passengers in the other vehicle had died. All I could do was cry and pray.
It was only 10am…and I was no longer concerned about turning 40.
As we paced through the hours of the day, our brains were in a haze from the overload of information and emotions. Yet, there are certain parts of life that just went on. For instance, it was my birthday, so I still had to get my car registration and tags renewed. At the BMV, I met saw a woman in line that I had seen at the hospital earlier in the day. Later, I found out her name was Ms. Lucy Oliver. As the battle for life and death circled around us, I had a chance to talk with one of St. V’s beloved employees. Weeks later, I would use her faith-filled testimony in one of my weekend messages.
In the days that followed the accident, my brother-in-law and sister-in-law held their daughter’s hand as her body struggled to survive surgery after surgery. Our immediate and distant family members would travel back and forth to the hospital to see and support in many different ways. Time moved fast and slow – simultaneously.
God spared my beautiful niece, Camie’s life. Over the past year, she’s worked so hard to regain the ability to walk and be mobile. She rocked out her academics and will graduate from high school next spring – an entire year early! Camie even got her driver’s license this year! Amazing! 365 days ago, I never could have imagined what today would look like.
As I think about the last 365 days of my life, there are so many different storylines to recall. Days of triumph, joy and peace mixed in with days of darkness, pain and confusion. Of course, I wish that there were more of the good days than bad ones, but as I get older, I’ve learned that the keeping score isn’t the point.
Sooooo, now I am 41. Yep, 41. This year, I choose to be grateful for the chance to live out every unknown (sometimes difficult or scary moments). When I remember that God has plans, not problems, I cope with life so much better.
For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen. If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me.
Jeremiah 29:11-13 (New Living Translation)
As a reforming control-freak, one of my biggest issues is not worrying about the future. Yet, God’s plans are for me. Whatever problems I am currently navigating are a part of His plan and thankfully, I can’t screw up His plan. Whew.
So, if you’re wondering what I am doing for my birthday this year, I’m repeating the verses in Jeremiah 29:11-13 to myself. Over and over again…
