I swear, it’s gonna be all over if the "other guy "wins!

Has that phrase or something similar come out of your mouth? It doesn't matter which candidate is the "other guy" for you, both sides feel like it will be the end of the world if the "other guy" wins. 

We’re a month out from the election, but our fears about what will happen after the election have been floating around for a long time now. This is called "election anxiety" and it's a real thing.

Look at the list of fears below. How many of these resonate with you?

I fear that the other person/other party will:

____ pass laws/agendas that oppose my religious beliefs.

____ reduce/remove some of my personal freedoms.

____ not protect me from personal pain or harm.

____ make us vulnerable to attack from other countries.

____ take away what I’ve worked so hard to gain or earn.

____ sink our country into financial collapse.

____ cause our country to fall into violence or chaos.

____ become a tool of Satan or usher in the End Times.

(By the way, did you notice how it doesn’t matter who your “other guy” is, that the fears are the same on both sides of politics?)

It doesn’t matter if you checked off one or all of them. I wanted to create space for you to get all of those fears about on the table. I’m not judging you, instead, I care about you, so that’s why I’m writing this post. My passion is helping women live beautifully strong and courageous in the midst of fear because I don’t want you to miss out on God’s great adventure of purpose for your life. If you’re struggling with election fear, I see you and I want to walk with you through this difficult space toward God's freedom and peace.

Uncertainty and Election Anxiety

Not knowing who will win the election creates just as much fear as wondering what will happen after the election.

Uncertainty drives us crazy. WE WANT TO KNOW IF WE'RE GOING TO BE OKAY! When we don’t know, those questions marks leave us feeling insecure and uncertain. Our natural negative bias kicks in and we begin creating negative mental movies in our minds about everything that we might lose or the pain that we might feel. If you’ve done my Joshua: Winning the Worry Battle Bible study, I call those negative mental movies, WorryFlix.  Like NetFlix or any other streaming media, WorryFlix serves up one awful episode after another in our mind. It’s so hard for us to stop watching!

Your mind collects whatever it is that you’re afraid of and uses that to script your WorryFlix episodes. The more that you read, watch or listen to in the news, the more WorryFlix election episodes that your mind can generate to keep you awake at night fearing the loss of everything that you hold dear.  The worst part is that your body feels your WorryFlix like it's really happening and the anxiety persists. But the good news is that you can win your election worry battle.

Canceling Your Election Anxiety

The Bible contains over 300 verses that contain “do not fear” or “do not be afraid” because God knew that we’d feel threatened by uncertainty. Being afraid isn’t a sin.

But God doesn’t want you to live IN fear. He wants you to live in confidence and security that He is with you and for you, no matter the elections outcome.

If you want to escape living IN fear, it begins with flipping your fear.

In my Joshua: Winning the Worry Battle Bible study, I say it like this:

The difference between worry and worship is who you are talking to.

For this year’s election, I’ve added one more sentence to that statement:

The difference between worry and worship is who you’re listening to.

For years, I fought a raging worry battle. The change came when I realize that I could turn my worries into prayers. One of the techniques that I write about in the Bible study is a smiple flip from "What if" to "God, if..."

Let's practice. Instead of saying:

What if _____ wins the election and wrecks the economy?

Flip that worry into a prayer and say, "God, if _____ wins the election and wrecks the economy, I know that YOU will/can _________. 

When you pray "God, if..." over "what if," that's how you cancel WorryFlix because as 1 John 4:18 says, "(God's) perfect love casts out fear."

I discovered this while reading about Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane praying before the soldiers came to arrest and crucify him. Jesus faced stress so intense, his sweat was like drops of blood (Luke 22:44). Yet, instead of "what if" worries, Jesus prayed, "God, if..." prayers . As Jesus prayed, "God, if..." he found the strength to face whatever lied ahead. You can, too. Do the flip from "what if" to "God, if..." whenever you begin stressing out about the election and God will give you the strength and peace to face whatever happens.

A few final thoughts. Take what you’d like and leave the rest…

1. God isn’t for or against one political party or another. It's insulting to God when we try to shove Him in our American political boxes.
2. I do not believe that God cares one iota about how you vote. God gives you a free-will, a conscious and His Holy Spirit to guide you. Vote based on your convictions and recognize that your convictions might be different than someone else’s.
3. Vote because it’s good stewardship. (Full Disclosure: I’ve voted in every presidential election since I was 18 years old except for the one election when I’d given birth six days before and didn’t feel physically well enough to make it to the polls.)
4. God is concerned with eternity, not this election. This presidential election and the next four years are a teeny-tiny blip on God's eternal timeline. Our country's future isn't guaranteed, but our eternal security in Christ is!
5. God cares about your character more than your comfort. If your election anxiety is related to the fear that you might lose makes you feel secure and happy, perhaps God's invitation is for you to shift your security to Him alone. BONUS: I've included a few graphics below with a few verses that you can save to your phone and recall when you're feeling election anxiety.

TODAY'S PRAYER: Dear God, you are my future! Today, I need to let go of my election anxiety and focus my eyes on you. I trust that Your presence, Your promises, and Your provision will be all that I need. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

COMMENT: What causes the most election anxiety for you? 

"This Bible study was made for the year 2020 with all of the things on in the world. It has helped keep my worries in check."

-S., Amazon Reviewer

"Beautiful Bible study book with so many practical and applicable ways to manage stress and anxiety. I enjoy working on this study so much. What better way to learn about God and His promises than through study of His word! This book is also very well organized and interactive. Highly recommend." -M., Amazon Reviewer

On Better Together, we talk about everything from our worries to our waistlines, and this episode is no exception!

On this episode of Better Together Facebook Live, host Barb Roose talks with Shari Braendel, who will share how you can still look fabulous over 50!

Big Ideas from Today's Show

1. Your outer appearance can be used to represent Christ to the world

Many of us are tempted to believe that how we look on the outside doesn't matter. Shari encourages us to remember that our appearance is important because it can be used to represent Christ to those around us!

2. Be yourself

Shari reminds us that God did not make a mistake when He created us! When we say that we hate something about ourselves, we are critiquing what God has made. Tonight, look at yourself in the mirror and say, "Thank you God for making me so beautiful."

3. It's not too late to make a change

If investing in yourself isn't something you've done in the past, it's not too late to make a change. True beauty is on the inside, however, choosing to make small changes on the outside is a great way to boost your confidence and change the way you show up in the world!

About Our Guest Shari Braendel...Shari Braendel is an author, Christian speaker, fashion editor, and a professional image consultant. She is one of the most sought-after Christian women speakers on the topic of beauty – inside and out, Christian fashion, and dressing with dignity. Recognized for her fun, engaging, and transparent speaker style, her Fashion Meets Faith event is said to be “one of the most empowering Christian conferences available to women today”.

Links from today's episode:

Fashion Meets Faith:

https://fashionmeetsfaith.com

Take the FREE color analysis quiz:

https://www.colorenalysis.com/index.html

Grab Shari's AMAZING Outfit Planner:

https://www.closetoutfitplanner.com/

Watch Style Tips with Shari:

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCWcpxUNosAi8Y5lufekSp5w

Better Together host Barb Roose is a popular speaker and author with a passion to help women live beautifully strong and courageous in Jesus' name. She's the author of multiple books and Bible studies, including Surrendered: Letting Go and Living Like Jesus and Joshua: Winning the Worry Battle. Visit Barb's online home at barbroose.com.

A few weeks ago, my 20-year old daughter boomeranged back into my empty nest. 

My beautiful girl attends nursing school at the local university. Due to the virus, much of her education is online via Zoom at home. What's challenged me lately is NOT sticking my nose into her class schedule to issue well-meaning reminders like, "Do you need to get up and log onto class?" or "I noticed that you've been on TikTok for six hours, shouldn't you be studying?"

None of that is my business. Why? She's 20 years old. She is an adult. She pays for her own schooling (academic scholarship!) and she was smart enough to get into nursing school. So, it's none of my business if she sleeps through her classes, studies or if she blows it all off.

Some of you are thinking, Barb, but what if she fails? or Com'on Barb, good moms give reminders!

I discovered that fear and pride were behind my control-loving behaviors like nagging and helicoptering (micro-managing). I've had to wrestle with fear-thoughts like "If she sleeps through that class, she might fail her test" or pride-thoughts like, "I will give her a this quick reminder and make her do what she should be doing."

I could give reminders to calm my fears or satisfy my pride. However, God desires for us to live by faith, not fear (1 John 4:18). Also, people don't like to be controlled. People really don't like for us to try to fix them. Our fear and our pride is ours to manage. Thankfully, God's already secured victory for us!

So rather than give up and get frustrated or give into fear, there's one more choice:

Surrender. Let go and give it to God.

I have to let all of that go. Sure, I'd hate for her to fail out of nursing school (she's not - she's doing just fine!) and I definitely think that she needs to be on TikTok less. But that's not my business either.

I have to let go because I am not in control of her life.

But, then what?

When we let go, then what do we hold onto so that we don't try to take control again?

Years ago, I learned a series of slogans while attending a family recovery support group because of my family member's alcoholism. For years, I tried to control out of extreme fear and destructive pride. Those recovery slogans equipped me with the tools that I needed to step back and let go of control. Even though they weren't based on scripture, God used those slogans to bring incredible peace and calm into my heart and mind - even though our family situation spiraled out of control. I was often heart-broken, but I stayed calm.

Over the years, I developed my own slogans, essentially six statements based on God's promises, provision and peace that I can hold onto when I let go of control.

Now, I want to give you the six powerful Surrender Principles from my Surrendered: Letting Go and Living Like Jesus Bible study based on God's Word that you can hold onto when you let go of control.

Six Surrender Principles

Surrender Principle #1: I am not in control of others or outcomes.
Surrender Principle #2: I choose to live by faith, not rush to follow my feelings.
Surrender Principle #3: I can always let go and give my problems to God.
Surrender Principle #4:  Trusting God's promises will bless me, but pushing my plans will stress me.
Surrender Principle #5: When fear tempts me to flee, fix or force my way, I will choose to stop and pray.
Surrender Principle #6: Surrender is my only path to God's peace, power and provision.

These principles work because they point you toward God rather than your struggling person or problem. Use them early. Use them often! But, it takes time, so be patient with yourself. (IDEA: You can do the Surrendered Bible study to give God an opportunity to transform your control-loving struggles into more focus on Him!)

BONUS: Click here for a printable of these six Surrender Principles!

CONCLUSION...
For my situation with my daughter, I'm using tools #1 and #4. She's doing just fine in managing her life, I'm the one who has to let go of of my fears or the pride in thinking that she can't keep her life together without my help.

I repeat these Surrender Tools early and often so that I can wrap myself in God's peace and trust that He is in charge of her life and not me. 

I'D LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU! COMMENT BELOW:
1. What person or problem do you need to let go of and surrender to God right now?
2. Which one of these Surrender tools do you too need to hold onto, memorize and repeat to yourself when you're tempted to control? 

Let Go and Live Like Jesus!

Are you a control-lover? There are five control-loving behaviors that trick us into thinking that we can fix the people and problems in our lives. However, when we try to control what we can't control, it often leads to chaos in our lives.

Are you tired of feeling stressed out and afraid of what you can't fix or control? There's hope!

Check out the Surrendered: Letting Go and Living Like Jesus Bible study or book, Surrendered: 40 Devotions to Help You Let Go and Live Like Jesus. Learn from Jesus' example AND six powerful tools that equip you to let go and experience God's power and peace!

If 2020 has taught us anything, it's that sometimes our best laid plans don't turn out the way we had hoped!

On this episode of Better Together Facebook Live, host Barb Roose talks with Heather Dixon who will share about how we can still have hope, even when we don't like our stories.

Big Ideas from Today's Show

1. "Difficult stories can become setups for the display of divine strength."

Heather encourages us to see our difficult moments from a different perspective. Take courage, friends. It is in the dark moments of our lives that God's glory and strength can be put on display. 

2. "You have permission to grieve."

If you are walking through a hard season right now, it is okay to grieve. Heather reminds us that we have a God who grieves with us in our hard moments. "To skip the step of grieving robs us of the chance to acknowledge that this world is broken and that we need Jesus."

3. "Sometimes God puts people in our lives to help ease the weight of our emotional burdens."

One of the ways that God helps to care for us is by sending someone to bless and encourage us. In Heather's words, "God's hope is delivered by human hands." Who are you thankful for in your life who has helped to carry your burdens?

About Our Guest Heather Dixon...Heather M. Dixon is an author, speaker, and Bible teacher who understands living with a story that is not easy. Diagnosed with an incurable and terminal genetic disorder that she inherited from her mother, she is passionate about encouraging and equipping women to trust in God, face their greatest fears, and live with hope, especially in the midst of difficult circumstances. When she is not blogging at The Rescued Letters or speaking at women’s conferences and events, Heather loves to make the most of everyday moments such as cooking for her husband and son, brainstorming all the possible ways to organize Legos and superheroes, checking out way too many library books, or unashamedly indulging in her love for all things Disney. Heather is a regular contributor to Journey magazine and the author of three Bible studies including Determined: Living Like Jesus in Every Moment and Renewed: Finding Hope When You Don't Like Your Story.

Links from today's episode:

Check out Heather's Website:

https://therescuedletters.com

Renewed Bible Study

https://www.abingdonwomen.com/bible-studies/renewed

Better Together host Barb Roose is a popular speaker and author with a passion to help women live beautifully strong and courageous in Jesus' name. She's the author of multiple books and Bible studies, including Surrendered: Letting Go and Living Like Jesus and Joshua: Winning the Worry Battle. Visit Barb's online home at barbroose.com.

If you've ever found yourself so busy trying to serve God that you've forgotten to actually spend time hearing from Him, you're in good company!

On this episode of Better Together Facebook Live, host Barb Roose talks with Julie Lyles Carr, about how to keep ministry from messing up our relationship with God.

Big Ideas from Today's Show

1. God is not the job.

Julie reminds us of how easy it is to allow the good things we are doing in our lives to get in the way of tending and cultivating our personal relationship with God. Ask yourself: Am I stuck on a ministry hamster wheel? Are there things in my life that are getting in the way of my relationship with God?

2. Be honest with yourself

Julie encourages us to take a real look at ourselves and be completely honest. Ask yourself: Why am I doing all of these things? What is my motive? Am I just trying to please people or get recognition?

3. Seek God

If you aren't exactly sure what God wants you to do in this season, ask Him! Take some time in prayer to ask, "God, what can I do with my life that pleases you?"

4. Know how to read the seasons well

Julie reminds us that life is full of seasons. In some seasons God may call you to be actively involved in ministry, but in others He may call you to rest. There is a time for everything!

Practical Temperature Check

Write down a list of the places in your life that you have obligations in and assign a season to each one.

Summer: A fully flourishing area where you are working hard and seeing God do great things.

Spring: A relatively new and exciting thing that you're just getting started.

Fall: You have been doing it for awhile. It's comfortable, but it doesn't fire you up like it used to.

Winter: You're just doing it because you don't want to let anybody down.

Look at your list and prayerfully consider which areas you need to remain in and where it may be time to let things go.

About Our Guest Julie Lyles Carr...Julie is a disciple, reader, writer, runner, photographer, wife to Michael, mom to a bunch. She is the founder of the media and communications company, Carr Consult. In addition to being a national speaker and best-selling author, she serves as the Pastor of LifeWomen Women’s Ministry at her home church of LifeAustin in Austin, Texas, where Randy Phillips of Phillips, Craig and Dean serves as Lead Pastor. She also founded and served as the Executive Director of Legacy of Hope Austin, a non-profit dedicated to serving families with children with special needs.

Julie is the host of the popular All Mom Podcast and has welcomed guests Beth Moore, Priscilla Shirer, Bob Goff, Max Lucado, Scott Hamilton, Emerson Eggerichs, Jennie Allen, Jamie Ivey, and more.

Links from today's episode:

Check out Julie's Website

http://julielylescarr.com

The All Mom Does Podcast 

https://www.allmomdoes.com/podcast

Footnotes Bible Study

https://www.amazon.com/Footnotes-Participant-Workbook-Lessons-Characters

Better Together host Barb Roose is a popular speaker and author with a passion to help women live beautifully strong and courageous in Jesus' name. She's the author of multiple books and Bible studies, including Surrendered: Letting Go and Living Like Jesus and Joshua: Winning the Worry Battle. Visit Barb's online home at barbroose.com.