by Barb Roose | Apr 18, 2014 | Reflections
Recently, I met my friend, Lisa, for lunch. It was a snowy day (so it could have been this past Tuesday, right?)
Anywhoo, Lisa and I arranged to meet at a little café about 30 minutes away from my office. It’s the kind of cute cafe that’s too quaint to show up on a GPS, so I drove past it a few times before I realized I had actually arrived.
Whenever womenfolk have lunch, we follow one of two strategies:
Lunch Strategy#1: The “Let’s celebrate and therefore eat whatever we want” strategy. This means that we’ll enjoy pasta, bread, butter and EVERYONE GETS dessert. #favorite
Lunch Strategy #2: The “Oh, I’m watching my weight” strategy. This means salad or a fruit bowl and sadly, no dessert.
Lisa and I rolled with option #2, but we had a great time anyways. When I checked my watch, I realized that it was time to scoot off for my next meeting. We hastily exchanged goodbyes and I fast-girly walked out of the café over an icy path to my car in 3″ heels.
Two hours later, I finished the next meeting and stopped for gas. When I opened my wallet, there was a $10 bill inside. It shouldn’t have been there because I had gone to lunch. Then, it hit me:
I SKIPPED OUT OF THE RESTAURANT WITHOUT PAYING FOR MY LUNCH!
I dined and dashed. Oh, no! Me? Yes! Of course, it was an accident, but I was a dine-and-dasher, just the same. Oh, shame, shame, shame on me!
In my mind’s eye, I could see the shocked look on that restaurant server’s face when a tall black woman in cute, heeled boots hightailed it up out of her small town café without paying for her lunch salad sans the dessert.
Shame on me…
Not to mention that the same tall black woman in the cute, heeled boots IS ALSO A PASTOR. And, for the record, pastors really should not dine-and-dash. It shouldn’t be a thing for anyone, but especially not pastors. It’s like #14 on the list of things pastors shouldn’t do, like right before “wear men’s skinny jeans.”
I tried calling the café from my car, but couldn’t get through. I thought it was because the café owner was on the phone with the police giving them a description of yours truly. At each stop light on the way back to the office, I practiced my mug shot face in the rearview mirror in case somehow I ended up on the news.
“Tonight on 13abc, local area pastor dine-and-dashes in 3″ heels. Full story at 6.”
On my third call, someone at the café picked up the phone. I blurted out my name and bumbled my way through a rambling, overly profuse apology. The woman on the other line was kind and gracious. When I finished making the messiest apology EVER, she laughed and replied, “Don’t worry it happens all of the time. Most people are honest and just drop off the money later.”
I couldn’t believe that instead of reading me the riot act and calling the police, the café lady excepted my apology and wished me a good day. (My friend, Tina, lives near the café so the next morning, she dropped off my payment, tip and another apology note.)
When I receive “good” but I deserve “bad”…
As a fugitive dine-and-dasher, I could have been tracked down and possibly arrested. And I would have deserved it.
Instead, the café owner forgave my offense. And in that moment, I was reminded of the principle of grace:
Grace is when we receive “good” even though we deserve “bad.”
God is in the “grace” business. He wants to give us what we don’t deserve. God wants to give us Himself, complete with access to His divine forgiveness, love, purpose, hope and power.
But, some are afraid to come close to Him: “Oh, I know that God says that He loves me, but look at my life. Look at the mistakes I’ve made.”
So, we try to fix ourselves. Must try to be a better person! We think God is a cosmic bean counter, so we can’t believe that God wants to give us “good” because we know that we deserve bad. How often have we tried to earn God’s goodness?
Here’s the truth: We can’t fix ourselves. We’re messed up at a level so deep that only God do anything about it.
So, what you and I need is GRACE. Grace is the very best of all good things.
Today is Good Friday. For many, it’s a religious day of observation or obligation. We’ll sit in church or see the photos of Jesus being beaten and crucified on this holy day. Whips, fists, blood, nails, cross. So many violent images – and while we may flinch in the moment, does the realization of this event impact our heart and lives? Did we forget that it is by his wounds that we are healed?
Jesus is our access to God’s grace…
Jesus came to give us “good” even though we deserve “bad” (photo credit: swordsoftruth.files.wordpress.com)
The simple truth is that God sent Christ to pay the cost for our sinfulness and instead of punishment, we received the free gift grace.
Doesn’t matter who you are. It doesn’t matter what you’ve done.
My friends, avoid being like the “good people” who deny their desperate need for God. Remember, the good (religious) people were the ones screaming “Crucify him” on a Friday long ago. God’s lavish grace is for those of us who realize that we can never be good enough. This divine grace extends especially to those who don’t think that forgiveness is possible. Hear this: No matter who you are or what you’ve done, God’s grace through Christ is a free gift for you.
So, I’m going to go out on a limb here and close with the simple prayer for those of you who want to experience God’s grace for yourself. If this is the true intention of your heart, then pray this prayer:
Dear God, forgive me for living my life apart from You. Today, I want to live out the rest of my life connected to You. I accept your free gift of grace made possible through Jesus Christ’s death and resurrection. I invite you to come into my heart and life. Help me to learn what it means to trust you and follow you all of the days of my life. Amen.
If you prayed that prayer…
Great! While you might not have seen fireworks, heard angels or felt all tingly inside, your life – and eternity – have been forever changed! I’d love you to send me an email or you can CLICK HERE and you can receive a free New Testament (click on “Request Packet”) and some other materials to help you understand what it means to have a relationship with God.
Happy Good Friday everyone!
If you don’t have a place to attend church on Easter, you’re welcome to watch LIVE online at www.cedarcreek.tv/live
Times: Friday – 5:15pm/7pm; Saturday – 3:30pm/5:15pm/7pm; Sunday 9am, 10:45am and 12:30pm
by Barb Roose | Jul 30, 2013 | Women's Topics
Last week was one of the most incredible weeks of my life. And, when I say the word “incredible,” I’m not just talking about spectacular. I’m talking about “are-you-kidding-me-is-this-actually-going-down-like-this” kind of incredible.
I traveled to North Carolina on Thursday with my friend, Bobbie, to attend Proverbs 31 Ministries She Speaks Writer and Speaker Conference. I met P31 president and best-selling author, Lysa TerKeurst back in May when I co-hosted the Fabulous Conference with my friend, Lauren. Lysa is an in-demand national keynote speaker, so when I found out that she was hosting a conference for emerging speakers and authors, I plunked down my money and registered.
One of the benefits of registering for the conference was an opportunity to meet with publishers and agents from all over the country. Since I had written a book proposal back in January, I figured it was time for me to pitch my book proposal while I was at the conference.
When I arrived at the conference on Friday morning, I had to hustle to schedule my publisher appointment. Hundreds of women were already scheduled to meet with agents and publishers and I was praying there would be a slot for me. A lovely woman named Sheila took my card and scheduled me for a 4pm Saturday appointment with a publisher from Abingdon Press named Pamela Clements.
Abingdon Press! It was the best news I could have gotten. My friend and author, Sandie Bricker (www.sandradbricker.com) published a very successful series of books with Abingdon Press, so I immediately inboxed her on Facebook. Within a few hours, Sandie responded and let me know that Ms. Clements was her editor’s boss. She included some important guidance to help me with my due diligence in preparing for my appointment.
After attending Friday’s incredible conference, from Lysa’s morning keynote, divinely-appointed breakout sessions and social media juggernaut, Michael Hyatt’s evening talk, I was baked – in a good way, not the kind of way that gets one arrested.
On our way back to the hotel, I remembered that the shirt I packed for the next day had two mysterious brown stains. I couldn’t wear it. I started brainstorming a Plan B. While brainstorming, I drove right past the street of our hotel. Rather than turn around on the busy highway, I asked Bobbie if I could drive over to the RossForLess retail store I had seen earlier in the day. Since I needed to buy a new outfit early in the morning, I wanted to see what time the store opened.
We pulled up to RossForLess at 10:24pm. I noticed that there were people still in the store. Could it be open? Yes! The store was open until 10:30pm. What store closes at 10:30pm? 10pm, yes. 11pm, yes. 10:30pm…what? I popped out of the car in my 4″ wedge sandals and hustled toward store. The automatic doors slid open and I scooted in at 10:26pm. Ignoring the stare of the cashier who was probably hoping I’d drop dead so she could clock out and go home, I ran to the dress section and started rifling through the racks until I found two dresses in my size and style.
Back at the hotel, I tried on the first dress and looked in the mirror. It fit fine and it was my style, but I wasn’t sure. Bobbie told me I was crazy, but I just didn’t feel confident when I looked in the mirror. A little too much shake and shimmy, if you know what I mean…
So, at 7:30am the next morning, I jumped out of bed and left the hotel search of Spanx. (For any guys reading, Spanx are like Magic Eraser for women’s bodies.) Ross For Less didn’t open until 9:00am and I needed to be at the conference by then. So, I kept driving even though I had no idea what to do next.
After two minutes, I turned my head to the right and saw a Wal-Mart off in the distance. When I checked my GPS earlier, Google Maps said the nearest Wal-Mart was 20 minutes away. Finally, a GPS error in my favor!
Did you ever stop to think about the most important decisions in your life and how 98% of the time, Wal-Mart is involved in those decisions. Buying a house? Chances are, you’ll be stopping at Wal-Mart. Getting married? You’ll be stopping by Wal-Mart. Having a baby? Wal-Mart. Pitching your first book proposal to a publisher? Definitely, Wal-Mart.
Now, Wal-Mart doesn’t actually carry the brand name, Spanx. Only certain fine department stores do. However, I really don’t want to use the word “girdle” over and over again. That would be awkward for all involved. So for the purposes of this blog post, Spanx = girdle. So, I ran into Wal-Mart and gratefully purchased the Spanx and drove back to the hotel.
Here’s the crazy part: Before my 4pm book pitch that afternoon, I had to give a five-minute talk to a group of ladies in an advanced speakers group. I obsessed over this talk for weeks. On my way back from Wal-Mart, I was inspired to completely change my five-minute talk to include my Spanx story. I dictated the new talk into my iPhone and finished it as I pulled into the hotel parking lot.
My new Spanx-inspired talk was completely and utterly me. During my five-minute presentation, I shared my insecurities about my appearance. I shared my heart to help other ladies learn to see God first in the mirror rather than focusing on the things that made them feel “less-than.” The ladies laughed about the Spanx and each gave me a knowing look when I talked about how much we hate feeling insecure about our appearance. Next, it was time for me to face the moment I’d waited a lifetime for…my publisher appointment.
I entered the room and extended my hand toward Ms. Clement. After sitting down and introducing myself, I took a deep breath and shared my Spanx story again. She listened as I recounted my struggles as well as what I’ve learned over the years about seeing myself through God’s eyes. To my surprise, Ms. Clements shared some of her life journey with me. We laughed over the ways the lengths that women go to in order to deal with their insecurities. At the end of my appointment, Ms. Clements asked if she could have my book proposal. I walked out of that room and felt the overwhelming lift of a lifetime’s worth of prayers answered. Then, I cried.
I couldn’t believe that a stained shirt could set into motion a series of events that would change my life over the course of 48-hours. I still can’t believe that RossForLess was open until 10:30pm and the only reason I found that out was because I accidently drove past the road to our hotel. I can’t believe that we happened to show up to the store four minutes before it closed – and I was able to find two dresses in less than 10 minutes. By the way, the dress I purchased was a Calvin Klein dark denim beauty for only $24.99. Girls, you know I had to share that!
I know that God set those series of events into motion and I am awestruck – and thankful. Soooo thankful. No, I don’t know how it will all turn out. I hope that the book will work out, but I’m grateful for how much I’ve gained and grown over this weekend.
Now, I’m back in Ohio, trying to adjust to post-vacation life. I’ve got a long week at work, kids playing soccer and a dog that has developed an skin allergy that will need some veterinary attention.
Yet, I have the memory of an incredible weekend when I was reminded that when things seem to be going wrong, it was just the preparation for God to show up.
STAY TUNED: On Friday, in my next post “Barb’s Vacation, Part II,” I’ll tell you about why Platform author Michael Hyatt tweeted me. Yes, me!
by Barb Roose | Jun 28, 2013 | Uncategorized
Planners comfort me. Always have. I love that there is something out there that is supposedly organizing my chaotic life. Even if that is not actually true, I like to believe that it is…
Before there was iCal or Outlook, I used a Blackberry to schedule my appointments and remind me to take my medicine. Before that, my Palm Pilot ruled my world! Remember how we loved the sleek, sexy design – but we didn’t love the little stylus that kept getting lost! Before Palm Pilots, we planned by paper. Of course, the Rolex of paper organizers was the good ole’ Franklin Planner. Owning a Franklin Planner was the ultimate confirmation that whatever I was doing must have been important. Yes, I was doing something important enough to write down in a $300 PAPER planning system. Anyone else feel silly knowing that we can get an iPad Mini for the amount we used to spend on a Franklin Planner? Sheesh!
I may not always follow the schedule I’ve written down, but I like knowing that it is there – that at some point I was smart enough to think ahead of the game. Yes, I love to plan.
Except for when it comes to food. No plans. I just want to eat what I want, when I want and how much I want.
I’m leading a group of women through Lysa TerKeurst’s best-selling book, Made to Crave. There’s a phrase that has been ringing in my ears every time I think about eating a second helping or a third cookie: unrestrained pleasure.
That phrase usually triggers the words of 1 Corinthians 10:23 – “Everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial.” And, then I get a little annoyed (and even a little panicked!)
Why? When it comes to food, I want what I want when I want it. I love how Lysa’s personal journey in this area of her life has had such a tremendous impact on the lives of so many others, including myself. I love how she challenges women to discipline themselves to find comfort and pleasure in Christ, not food. Let’s face it, whenever we have an extreme emotion – happiness or sadness, we automatically reach for something to put into our mouths. Yet, when we finish our consumption, we end up with an entirely different set of feelings…and most of those feelings are of shame or regret.
So, this past week, the ladies in my group and I agreed if we plan for the things that are important, then we would commit ourselves to planning our meals for the next two weeks. Our agreement isn’t because we’re all trying to look like some size 2 supermodel. Rather, we’re making a plan to put food in its nourishing, rightful place and for us to focus on finding comfort and pleasure in God alone.
Truth is, I was sweating as I was posing the challenge. This means that I have to lead by example and frankly, I’m not sure I want to. But, I will. I hope.
Wish me luck. And don’t send me any chocolate.
