Have you ever heard of “word clouds?” It’s a visual exercise where you can drop in a block of written content and find out which words you use most often. For example, I used WordClouds.com and inserted the copy from three of my recent Happy Monday devotionals into the generator.

Here’s a picture of the word cloud. The size of the words is related to how often they are used.

Can you tell which words I used most often?

Thankfully, “God” was used most often - kinda important since is a weekly devotional, right? The next word that stands out is “new.” I need help deciding between whether “can” or “today” is tied for third place. Looks like “prayer” is solidly up next. I feel good about that!

Question…If you could put your prayers in a word cloud, what words would be highlighted? Which words in your prayer would be so small that they were barely visible?

For the past few weeks, I’ve highlighted different verses from the psalms because first, the Book of Psalms is awesome, right? Second, I am still celebrating the release of my new book, Finding Jesus in the Psalms and finally, the prayers written in the Book of Psalms meets me where I’m at in my personal life these days.*

Today, let’s talk about some of the words that God loves to hear from you most often. 

Last week, this verse caught eye and brought back an important memory of hearing my childhood pastor, Rev. John Medley at the Fellowship Baptist Church. At the end of every church service, he led our congregation in Psalm 19:14.

Here’s a picture from my Bible of that verse - in my Bible, I draw a heart by my favorite verses, like this one:

Our words reflect what is in our hearts. So, as King David writes these words, what he wants to express is his heart desire to worship God above all else that was happening in his life.

But that’s not easy is it? It’s hard to worship God when you’re wondering about how you’re going to get everything done or you’re worried about the future or different people. Yet, this prayer may be exactly what you and I need to pray more often.

What words or heart attitude is pleasing to God? Today, let’s talk about three phrases that you can say that not only honor God, but also, bless you:

God Loves the Words: "Thank You, God"

God loves it when you tell Him thanks because that means that you are paying attention to where He is present with you, how He is providing for you, when He is sustaining and comforting you. Each time that you stop to give God thanks, you re-center God in your life. Instead of only thinking about yourself, you’re reminded that God is with you and for you. So not only does your gratitude please God, but you are blessed by acknowledging how much God loves you.

God Loves the Words: "Yes, LORD"

This one is hard! But God loves is when you say, “Yes, LORD.” This is your willingness to follow God’s way and not your own. God never will ask you to do something that isn’t for your good. So, when you sense God giving you a direction or you read something in the Bible that pings your spirit, say, “Yes, LORD” and ask for help to do it. There’s a blessed sense of peace when you agree to walk out God’s path for you.

God Loves the Words: "I trust You, God"

Even more challenging than “Yes, LORD” is “I trust You, God.” Most of us are concerned, worried or even terrified about some aspect of the future. But, uncertainty is never uncertain when we trust that God is in control.

It maybe helpful today for you to say aloud right now, “I trust You, God with ________________ in my life.”

You may not feel like saying it, but you can practice saying it until you start believing it. Trusting God is a form of surrender and if you’ve done my Surrendered study, you remember Surrender Principle #6: Surrender is the only path to God’s peace.

I’d love to hear from you! Post a comment and share which one of those phrases are you going to work on saying more often today? 

Calling all book lovers! If you are a fan of Christian fiction, then chances are, you've heard of best-selling author Tessa Afshar. Guess what?! I recently talked with Tessa and in this new episode, we're discussing her new novel, The Hidden Prince, as well as Tessa's fascinating background. She was born in the Middle East, survived boarding school in England and then moved to the United States and came to Christ in her 20s. During today's conversation, you'll find out about how Tessa writes novels to help you embrace God's love and truth in powerful ways.

RESOURCES FROM THIS EPISODE

tessaafshar.com

ABOUT OUR SPECIAL GUEST

Tessa Afshar's book have been translated into 11 languages, and loved by fans around the world. Her novels have been on Publishers Weekly and CBA best-selling lists. Her book, The Way Home, God's Invitation to New Beginnings, is the winner of the Christian Book Award in the Bible Study category. Afshar's biblical and historical novels have won a number of awards including the Christy and INSPY, and been named as one of top five Christian fiction titles of the year by Library Journal. Tessa holds a Master of Divinity from Yale, where she was co-chair of the Evangelical Fellowship at the Divinity School for one year. She served in women and prayer ministry for twenty years before becoming a full-time writer and speaker. She is a devoted wife, a mediocre gardener, and an avid lover a chocolate.
Check out this episode!

Sometimes it's hard to determine whether we are hearing God's voice or whether it's our own thinking. It's possible to learn how to hear God's voice in your life!

 In this new episode, Barb talks with the founder of Equipping Godly Women, Brittany Ann about the 6 tips to help you hear God's voice loud and clear in your life.

Brittany Ann leads a large online community committed to helping Christian women live all in for Jesus. She's a wife, mom, and Bible teacher who loves to challenge and encourage women to grow in their faith.

RESOURCES FROM THIS EPISODE

equippinggodlywomen.com

Follow God's Will: Biblical Guidelines for Everyday Life

ABOUT OUR SPECIAL GUEST

Brittany Ann is an ECPA bestselling author, speaker, and founder of EquippingGodlyWomen.com, a popular Christian-living website dedicated to helping busy Christian moms find practical ways to go "all in" in faith and family. Brittany is the author of books including "Fall in Love with God's Word: Practical Strategies for Busy Women" and "Follow God's Will: Biblical Strategies for Everyday Life." Her work has been featured on CBN, The Christian Post, Crosswalk, and more.
Check out this episode!

It's not over yet! If you are still breathing, then God has big dreams for you!

Join Barb on this new episode for an inspiring, powerful and at times hysterical conversation with speaker, author, leader, Jo Saxton.

Jo is the founder of the Ezer Collective and dedicated to investing in women leaders around the world. She was born in Nigeria, raised in London and now lives in Minneapolis with her family. Jo's message will encourage and inspire you to go further than you ever could have imagined! 

Barb has admired Jo from afar for many years. In this episode, Jo shares powerful words and wisdom to relight your inner fire and challenge you to own your voice, live out your purpose and how to stop apologizing for your desire for more. 

RESOURCES FROM THIS EPISODE

josaxton.com

Jo's Upcoming Ezer Collective Events!

ABOUT OUR SPECIAL GUEST

Jo Saxton is a speaker, podcaster, author, guest TV host and leadership coach. She is the founder of the Ezer Collective and dedicated to investing in women leaders around the world, equipping them to own their voice and embrace their purpose and catalyze their calling. Born to Nigerian parents and raised in London, England, Jo now lives in Minneapolis with her husband, and two daughters. She loves the everyday stuff like good music, good food, and good friends. And Target. She really, really loves Target.
Check out this episode!

When it comes to the topic of race and racial healing, many of us have one of two responses: hide away from the uncomfortable conversation or become overzealous and use our words to cut and hurt others.

In today's episode, our special guest, Dr. Lucretia Carter Berry, shows us a new approach that is characterized by understanding, growth, and grace. 

Barb and Lucretia invite you to join them for an honest, grace-filled but necessary discussion about accepting God's call to dive into the deep (and at times terrifying) waters, taking the time to learn, and rising up to teach and educate our families as well as others in our lives. 

RESOURCES FROM THIS EPISODE

brownicity.com

Teaching for Justice and Belonging: A Journey for Educators and Parents

Hues of You: An Activity Book for Learning About the Skin You Are In

ABOUT OUR SPECIAL GUEST

Lucretia Carter Berry, PhD is an author, educator, speaker, and the founder of Brownicity, an agency committed to making important, scholarly-informed, antiracism education accessible, and the director of its learning community.

With the tagline, Many Hues, One Humanity, Brownicity's mission is to foster education designed to inspire a culture of justice and true belonging for all.

Lucretia earned her PhD in Curriculum and Instruction and MA in English from Iowa State University, and her BA from South Carolina State University.

A former college professor, Lucretia's research, experience, and accomplishments lie at the intersections of curriculum and instruction, antiracism education, and instructional technology.

As a wife in an interracial marriage and mom of three multiethnic children, Lucretia brings her personal and professional experience to the public sector where she is passionate about serving children and their adult decision-makers. Her books, courses, and TED Talk quell fears associated with racial literacy.

Her learning-centered approach is inspirational, appreciated, and celebrated. Lucretia is married to Nathan; they live in North Carolina with their three daughters and two aussie-doodles.

Lucretia is the author of:

Hues of You - An Activity Book for Learning About the Skin You Are In'

What LIES Between Us - Fostering First Steps Toward Racial Healing

Teaching for Justice and Belonging - A Journey for Educators and Parents

Check out this episode!

Are you grieving and desperate for people to understand how you really feel? 

 After author Gwendolyn Burton's 26-year old son died suddenly from an epileptic seizure, no one around her could say anything to help her feel better. She's spent years working through the grieving process and has captured her journey and the lessons learned in her new book "You Don't Know Just How I Feel". 

Barb invites Gwendolyn to be raw and honest about the grieving process including how to show kindess and care to someone who is grieving.

Grief is so personal, but in this episode, Gwendolyn shares practical boundaries, grief self-care, how to handle social media as well as how to find hope after devastating loss. 

RESOURCES FROM THIS EPISODE

gwendolynoburton.com

You Don't Know Just How I Feel

ABOUT OUR SPECIAL GUEST

After three miscarriages and an adult son who passed away from sudden unexpected death in epilepsy (SUDEP), Gwendolyn Burton is uniquely qualified to help others navigate their grief journey by discussing common challenges and misconceptions. She studied with grief expert David Kessler, founded Sisters in Solace (SiS), a support group for mothers of child loss, and is a Certified Grief Educator. Gwendolyn enjoys physical fitness and lives in Aurora, Colorado, with her husband, son, and three dogs.

Check out this episode!

If you find that you take a long time to process, feel emotions strongly, or can be highly stimulated by external factors such as scent and taste, chances are that you may be an HSP (highly sensitive person)!

Today on the show, we have the pleasure of hearing from Cheri Gregory, an HSP and the co-creator of Sensitive and Strong, a place where fellow HSPs can grow, encourage one another, and discover the beautiful way that God has made them to function. 

 Being an HSP is an incredible blessing! So whether you think you may be one yourself or know others in your life who exhibit these characteristics, this episode is for you!

RESOURCES FROM THIS EPISODE

sensitiveandstrong.com

Take the HSP Quiz!

ABOUT OUR SPECIAL GUEST

Through Scripture and storytelling, Cheri Gregory delights in helping women draw closer to Jesus, the strength of every tender heart. She is the co-leader of Sensitive & Strong, the founder of Write Beside You coaching services, and coauthor of five books. Cheri speaks locally and internationally for women's events and educational conferences. She and her college sweetheart, Daniel, have been married for more than three decades. They've spent the last 15 years living and serving on a Christian boarding school campus on the central California coast. You can connect with SensitiveAndStrong.com.

Check out this episode!

“Mom, can you just do what I asked?”

My sweet girl stood in front of me in her lacy wedding gown, rhinestone beaded veil and a scowl on her heart-shaped face. It was five minutes until the start of her wedding and she’d made a request that I didn’t think needed to be done. In my sweetest smile and “Mom Knows Best” voice, I tried to dissuade her.

As I mentally planned my better solution to her request, my daughter squeezed her fingers around her bouquet. I saw her chest lift and her cheeks expand to puff out frustrated air. Very calmly she said, “Mom, please just do what I asked.”

My daughter is a 26-year old woman and it was her wedding day. She had made a request.  While I had the right to help or not to help, it wasn’t my place to nudge or push her toward what I thought was best.

Turns out, I needed to walk out some repentance just before I walked down the aisle to my seat. I’d tried to control a situation that was none of my business. Even though I thought I knew best, that didn’t mean that my way was better. Worst of all, I justified my control loving behavior because I was doing it with a smile.

How often do you nudge people toward your view of how they should act, believe, think or live?

If you aren’t sure, here are five control-loving behaviors that indicate that you’re attempting to fix someone or force certain outcomes.

I call thesse the SHINE Control-Loving Behaviors:

Stonewalling - Inflexibility or unwillingness to cooperate or collaborate

Helicoptering - Micromanaging others to do something the way that you want it done

Interrupting - Either cutting off someone’s words or interfering with someone’s life choices

Nagging – Repeating requests (Generally, saying it once is asking, repeating more than once is nagging…)

Excessive Planning - Overplanning every minute detail so that your specific plan takes place.

Which ones are your go-to’s? Who do you tend to use these on most?

To be clear, no one is judging you for these behaviors. Additionally, struggling with control-loving issues doesn’t mean that you don’t love others – it often means that you do love them, but controlling others is actually unloving.

Why do we use control-loving behaviors?

The truth is that control-loving behaviors indicate that you’re trying to slide into God’s place in someone’s life, especially if it’s someone who should be responsible for themselves.

These behaviors are a reaction to our fears, our anxieties or reveal where we struggle to trust God.

In my case,  I served up of a hefty dish of interrupting my daughter’s wishes with a spicy side dish of helicoptering. I was worried that her pre-wedding ceremony request would offend our guests. Turns out, I was wrong and I caused unnecessary conflict between us.

It’s not easy letting the people that we love live their life on their own terms, is it? If they are irresponsible or lack life experience, we fear the consequences for their lives.

Let’s be honest, we also want to avoid feeling pain or inconvenience as well. But, is avoiding pain and consequences justification for us to play God in someone’s life?

Isn’t it God who knows what’s best, not us? Isn’t God sovereign, even in the small things? Yes, He is!

“My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,” says the Lord. “And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine.”

-Isaiah 55:8 NLT

Anytime we pull out those control loving behaviors, it may seem like they are out of love but they often reveal our attempt to slide into the role of a god in someone else’s life. To be clear, we are pitiful and destructive substitutes for God.

I don’t know where today’s conversation meets you in your life. Perhaps, it’s good to take a moment to review today’s verse and reflect on whether you’re using any control-loving behaviors in a way that puts you in the position of God in someone else’s life. That can be heavy to consider, but worth it for both your sake, their sake, and your relationship with them.

Prayer

God, open my eyes and reveal my blind spots to where I have been subtly trying to control others. It’s hard when I’m worried and concerned about a situation or those that I love, but I need to turn all of my worries and cares over to You. I trust that You know what is best so help me to let go of trying to control. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS: Which control-loving behaviors pop up for you? If you've battled to let go of control, share your story below to encourage others!

It’s the final summer holiday, friends! Traditionally, Labor Day is when we scramble to get in that last cookout or day at the lake before we turn our attention to pumpkin spice lattes and sweaters. Depending on your family or political background, Labor Day has varied importance. I’m not here to get into the background of Labor Day, but today does inspire today’s devotional:

Do you regularly take a break from your labor?

As women, we tend to feel guilty about taking breaks or stopping our work. It doesn’t matter if we’re single, married, single again, with or without children, there always seems to be one more thing that we can do, right?

Yet, our bodies are not built for endless work, endless planning or endless activity. Like a gas tank, we run out. In fact, we KNOW that we’ll run out of energy and yet, we keep going. But why?

It's often because we believe two things:

1. It won't get done unless we do it.

2. Unless we work 24/7, our lives will fall apart unless we're to keep everyone and everything together and moving forward.

That's the mindset for exhaustion! When we're exhausted, we tend to let it show. Which one of these are true for you?

Easily annoyed...

Overly sensitive...

Impatient...

Desparate...

Here’s a hard question: How do your loved ones experience you when you’re exhausted? Do they feel more or less loved about you?

The truth is that when you and I don’t stop to rest, the quality of our relationships reflect our exhaustion. You can’t give what you don’t have, my friend.

In Genesis 1, God creates the world and if you’re familiar with this story, you recall how God stopped working at the end of each day. Then, He took a break at the end of His project, which was creating the world. So, God took regular breaks and then, He took a rest.

To be clear, God didn’t need to do that. But, He did to show us the principle of working hard and then, choosing to take breaks and allowing ourselves regular periods of rest.

It took years for me to break the habit of non-stop work. In my mind, I used to say things like, “I’ll just do one more thing” or “If I don’t do this, I’ll be behind later.” Can you relate?

Do you want to know what helped me break my bad habit of not taking breaks or resting? Sabbath or what I call "Shut Down Days."

For my entire life, I've been a work-a-holic until fifteen years ago when I began to follow God’s Sabbath example, which Jesus reaffirmed in the New Testament. 

Shut Down Days mean that I have no apointments or obligations on my calendar for work. I don't plan housework or errands. I let my mind rest from problem-solving.  (Even when I was married and had kids at home, I would do urgent cleaning the night before my Shut Down Day and arrange a crock pot meal or takeout.)

On Shutdown Days, my soul takes a deep breath because I'm not pushing myself. I am gentle with my body and I can literally feel my brain recharging and my body repairing itself.

Here's a bottom line that I use to remind myself: "You are blessed when you rest."

I know that many of you know that you need to do this, but you aren’t sure that you can make it work for your life. Here’s what years of a weekly Shutdown Day has done for me:

1. Increased Faith - I also have time to reflect on my relationship with God and I can listen for any the Spirit’s without feeling rushed.
2. Freedom from Control-Loving Behaviors - Each week, I must trust God with whatever I am not getting done that day. Practicing letting go of control on my Shutdown Day makes it easier for me to let go of control on other days.
3. Stronger Mental Health - Our brains need rest just like our bodies. Giving my brain a break from planning and problem-solving allows it to recharge and work better the rest of the week. Trust me, this works!
4. Loving Others Better - Since I have a whole day with no meetings or obligations, I can catch up with my loved ones and friends. I can ask how people are doing, listen and pray for others. A Shutdown Day is a great way to improve relationships!

Which one of these looks the most attractive to you?

If you feel like you're about to fall apart because you're life is spinning out of control or you exhuasted, a Shut Down Day maybe what God wants to use to recharge and recalibrate your mind, bodies and souls.

Friends, when people ask me how I can keep my busy travel, write books and encourage others, my weekly Shutdown Day is a huge reason why.

I’d love for you to try a Shutdown Day if you don’t always have a rest day. FREE RESOURCE: I’ve got a quick start-up guide and you can download here.

Don’t worry about being perfect to start. As a best-selling author says, “Make progress, not perfection.”

I truly hope that today’s Labor Day inspires you to start this life-giving habit!

COMMENT BELOW: Which one of the Shut Down Day Benefits is most attractive for you? If you regularly take a Sabbath, how are you blessed?