by Barb Roose | Jul 20, 2015 | Christian Living/Discipleship
I love adventure! To a certain extent, I’m even wired for it. Embracing a challenge that makes my blood rush gives me a thrill. While I’m not interested in pushing the odds of an early demise, I like to push myself from time to time.
One of the best adventures of all was when I went skydiving in June 2011. Whenever I talk about going skydiving, the first question people ask is WHY?! Well, the simple answer is that I didn’t want to pet a tarantula. Ha!
In June 2011, I prepared to give a weekend message about Caleb and Joshua from the Old Testament. The message theme was courage, so as our top-notch programming team suggested that I do something courageous to kick off the series. The room started buzzing at that point and I knew what was coming:
Someone: “I’VE GOT IT! Barb, you could go to the zoo and pet a tarantula.”
Me: “No.”
Someone: “But, that would take courage.”
Me: “Sobbing hysterically and peeing my pants on camera isn’t courageous. What else we got?”
Someone else: “You could go skydiving. Hahaha!!”
We called 1-800-SKY-DIVE and just like that, I was going skydiving. THE NEXT DAY.
The next morning, I drove 2 1/2 hours east to a little town just outside of Canton, Ohio with one of our arts pastors and one of our videographers. My parents only lived about 30 minutes from where I would do the jump, but I figured I would call them after I survived instead of before. No need to worry them, right? After all, I promised my husband that I would try to not die and that I’d be home in time to make dinner.
On arrival, there were lots of papers to sign, but it really could have been summed up by stating “If you die, it isn’t our fault.” Then, I headed over to pick up my jumpsuit. I’m not a jumpsuit kinda girl, and they don’t exactly make them cute, but whatever.
Next, I participated in a 30-minute instructional session and learned how parachutes worked. They also explained what I needed to do in the air and most importantly, right before landing. Remembering those important details kept my mind off the fact that I would freefall 10,000 ft to the ground.
Then, I met my jump partner, Mike. My suit had a hook that would be tethered to Mike’s hook on the way down. Why? Because 30-minutes isn’t nearly enough time to learn how to jump out of an airplane on my own and survive. Imagine my thrill when Mike mentioned that he’s jumped out of an airplane over 5,000 times. Jumping out of a plane for Mike was like driving to work for me. And, Mike was tall, so I didn’t have to worry about squishing him if we landed wrong.
Mike and I walking out to the plane. Excited, but nervous!
Notice how I’m tucked up right next to the pilot. It was a tight space, but I had enough room to fold my little hands together and pray.
Finally, it was time.
Mike and I walked out to the teeniest, tiniest, dinky little plane I’d ever seen. There wasn’t enough room for me to sit in the back with the other two jumpers. So I sat in a space on the floor next to the pilot, facing toward the back of the plane. As we taxied down the field, the pilot told us that it would take about 20 minutes for us to reach our jump zone. That meant I had 20 minutes to think. And pray. And pray more. There was lots ‘o praying.
Here’s the video from the weekend message, including the skydive. Just keep reading after the video!
Lots of people asked me if I was scared. Not really. I like to sum it up in one word: crazy! Free-falling at 120mph is pretty wild. I loved how fast we were moving through the air and I was excited that Mike was doing all of the work so that I could enjoy the moment. I was tethered to someone who knew what he was doing and that made all of the difference.
Just the same is if you walk with God, you’re tethered to Him and He will never leave you alone.
So, the point of sharing my story wasn’t to convince you to go skydiving. But, I hope that my story might prod you toward in to take a brave step of faith toward some place God has been calling you to go. For every place God calls you to go, He goes with you – and that’s the most important thing to remember.
In the Old Testament, there were numerous times when God reminds His people to press forward, even though they might be worried about how things will turn out. Here’s God’s reminder:
“This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” – Joshua 1:9
These are the words I want to leave you with today. For whatever you are facing today that makes you anxious, afraid, or discouraged, you are not alone. When we think that we’re all alone, it’s never a good feeling. Yet, in both the Old and New Testament, we see God’s constant message that even though we live in a world where bad things happen and evil exists, God is present. We can press forward through difficult, even tragic circumstances with bravery and courage when we remember that God is present and will strengthen us through our trials.
Be strong and courageous, today.
This photo was captured mid-air during my skydive. I call it my “Kermit the Frog” picture.
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by Barb Roose | Jul 6, 2015 | Christian Living/Discipleship, Women's Topics
Three years ago if you asked me what chronic illness was, I would have replied with something along the lines of, “I don’t know, but it sounds pretty terrible.”
Here’s the lovely Lauren Gaskill. We connected a few months ago and it’s been a blessing getting to know her. Check out Lauren’s beautiful blog, MakingLifeSweet.com for inspiration on topics related to happy, healthy living. She also share flavorful and easy food recipes – the photos will make your mouth water! Photo credit: A.Photographer
For the first 18 years of my life, I enjoyed a blissfully healthy existence. Every now and then I would get a sinus infection or the flu, but I never experienced any major complications. I was an optimistic, spunky, sassy and energetic young woman — and nothing could rob me of that. I had no problem waking up, going to swim practice two times a day, taking care of schoolwork and staying up late into the night hanging out with friends. On the side, I worked as a lifeguard and swim lessons instructor and never felt too fatigued to do my job.
I don’t remember exactly when it happened, but one day during my sophomore year of college in 2011, everything changed. One fall morning I woke up with lockjaw, a migraine and full body pain. Things were never the same after that. Headaches became a daily occurrence, my body felt like it had been hit with 2x4s, and my neck, jaw and back were in a constant state of semi-debilitating to unbearable pain.
Sometimes the pain was enough to make me skip class and stay in bed. But then there were periods of time — months even — when the pain wasn’t so bad. Half of my days were what I like to call “good” days and half were “bad” days. I had an MRI done of my head just to make sure nothing abnormal was happening and when the reading came back normal, I just carried on with life as I knew it. I tried not to think about the pain and if I needed to, I took Advil to help me get through the bad days.
Fast forward to 2014. From the outside looking in, it was a very happy year in my life. I landed two jobs fresh out of college, became engaged and married my best friend, and we bought our first home in Minnesota. But on the inside my chronic pain was worse than ever and I started sustaining injuries just from doing normal activities.
After a slew of doctor’s office visits, specialists’ visits and tests, I received an official diagnosis of fibromyalgia and hypermobility in March 2015. My family members and friends were devastated for me. We’re so sorry Lauren. That’s awful news, they said. But the truth was while others lamented, I felt relieved. For four years, I had stuffed and hidden my pain to keep doing life according to what I considered to be “normal.” But now that I had an official diagnosis, I knew I needed to start making health a bigger priority. I needed to start listening to my body so I could manage my condition.
If you’ve ever heard of the spoon theory, you know what I meant earlier by good days and bad days. Some days I wake up without a headache and feeling like myself. On those days, I am blessed with many spoons. Other times I wake up with maybe one spoon to make it through. On these days I must prioritize taking care of my health. I have learned that even though my soul wants to soldier on, it’s essential in these moments to back off, listen to my body, and treat it kindly.
If that means backing out of a dinner, canceling plans or taking a break from blogging to focus on my health, then that is what I’ll do.
Chronic illness has taught me that I can’t do it all — and that’s OK. This is where Jesus comes in.
All of these lessons aside, the biggest thing I’ve learned is that even though I can try to manage my chronic condition, ultimately relying on Jesus is the only thing that really gets me through. He gave me this one body and this one life to live. And I am called to take care of my relationship with Him just as much as I am called to take care of my health.
I have found that the more I focus on Jesus, the less I think about all of the pain and heartache that fibro and hypermobility can inflict upon me. On both the good and bad days, prioritizing Him is the best decision I could ever make because He is the supplier of my peace, joy and strength.
Thanks, Lauren for sharing your story with us!
Ladies, you can share your story, too! If you’re living with chronic pain, how do you take care of yourself? How can we best support you on those difficult days? If you want to read more from Lauren, check out her blog, Makinglifesweet.com.
I’m so glad that you stopped by to check out today’s post. It is such a pleasure and privilege to share inspiration and encouragement with you! Did you see last week’s post on why Pixar’s movie, “Inside Out” made me cry? Click here to check it out!
by Barb Roose | Jun 29, 2015 | Christian Living/Discipleship
Congrats, Pixar. You made me cry during another one of your movies. Again.
My hubby, two younger daughter and I went to see “Inside Out” a few days ago. Imagine my annoyance when I had to reach for a tissue. It’s a cartoon for goodness’ sake! I think that making adults cry at movies is some kind on conspiracy. In fact, my conspiracy has a name. I call it the “Bambie Effect.” ‘Cause upon a time, Disney killed off Bambie’s mom and made adults cry. Walt’s people got away with it and Pixar has perfected the art of making adults cry at animated movies. #Up #ToyStory3
“Inside Out” is a movie about feelings. Yep, feelings finally got their own feature movie. This digital psychological journey animates all of the emotions that we have at some point or another. We meet colorful and interesting emotions named Joy, Sadness, Fear, Anger and Disgust. Movie watchers observe the dynamics and dynamite between those emotions as they struggle to help the main character, Riley, navigate her feelings after moving cross-country with her family.
It doesn’t take long before I realize that the movie’s theme presses us with the following question: Can our dogged pursuit of happiness actually hurt us?
Photo credit: hercampus.com
Photo credit: babyrazzi.com
The answer is yes. We watch as well-meaning Joy ends up causing Riley most amount of pain in the movie. As I watched Joy’s well-intentioned efforts cause pain and mayhem, a few thoughts came to mind during the movie:
When happiness is our highest goal, we’re tempted to manipulate what we value in order to achieve it.
How often do we long just to be happy? We want to be happy. We want to make other people happy. Yet, our pursuit of happiness might be at the expense of other more important things.
In her singular mission to try to keep Riley happy, Joy moved and manipulated the other emotions out of her self-righteous way. If Riley was in the midst of a bad day, Joy raced to replace Riley’s bad memory with a happy one. If Riley had a nightmare, Joy rushed in to whisk it away. As Joy bounced all over the command center switching and moving memories to keep Riley a happy girl, we had an impending sense of doom.
When things in our lives starts sliding in the wrong direction, we start clawing for happiness because anxiety, pain and anger just feel bad. There are times when we feel like we’re stuck on a losing streak, right? Our car breaks down. Then, the basement floods. Next, our kids’ get sick or we break the screen on our iPhone. When we have so many bad feelings, we are desperate to feel good. If we get desperate enough, we’ll grab for happiness wherever we can find it – even if it’s not good for us. You can fill-in-the-blank for whatever that might be for you: overspending, overeating, sexual irresponsibility, theft, etc. Have you ever made a bad decision because you wanted to enjoy a good feeling?
As the movie unfolds, young Riley’s distress mounts. The other emotions call out caution, but Joy pushes for happiness. She didn’t want Riley to dwell on sad memories. Furthermore, Joy doesn’t want listen to the other emotions’ input. I cringed as i watched Joy rush to phrases I’ve used before: “Let’s focus on the positive and what’s going right” or “It will be just fine.”
Sometimes, we need to lean into our sadness…
I learned the most from Sadness in the movie. I’m an realistic optimist. I know that bad things happen in this world. I’m not stranger to problems and heartache, but I maintain my optimism. So, the movie’s character, Sadness, grated on my nerves. Sadness shuffled around with seemingly nothing to offer. There were problems to solve and frankly, Sadness wasn’t helping. At one point, Joy drew a circle and asked Sadness to step inside and stay out of the way. As rude as that moment seemed, I’ve been guilty of something similar. If I just stay positive…No negative thinking…
As the movie went on, Joy and Sadness were separated from the rest of the emotions. This ends up being a good thing. There is a pivotal scene where Sadness creates an opportunity for another character to grieve and move on past a painful event and smile again. Joy realizes letting Sadness be a part of Riley’s memories wouldn’t ruin the joy of those memories. Instead, Sadness gave Riley’s memories much more impact and depth.
This is a deep and profound truth for all of us.
My most precious memories are made up of heartbreaking moments combined with the presence of treasured friends. In difficult moments, sadness is the emotion that slows us down so that others can care for us.
Sadness creates space for friends to sit with us in our despair and let us know that we are not alone. During sad times, friends embrace us and comfort us just by being there. Sadness is often the emotion that attracts compassion and pours it into our lives.
If heartache is part of our humanity, then it’s possible for sadness to be a gift.
Imagine how cold and callous we would be if bad things happened and we didn’t pause to feel them deeply or acknowledge their impact on our lives? Pretending that life doesn’t hurt actually hurts us. Pretending that we aren’t wounded may actually come from a place of pride. We don’t want others to know that we are just like everyone else. If I am not careful, this is the very place I can end up. The healthiest of humans know that deep pain cannot be healed in a vacuum. Time does not heal all wounds, but friends can. And we should not be afraid or ashamed to let others comfort us.
Compassion is powerful and helps us heal. Often, won’t realize how much we need compassion until we receive it. We shouldn’t be afraid to let others who us compassion, especially since the givers of such compassion have experienced the power of receiving it. Here’s a verse that I think of when I hear of sad moments. This is a great reminder and prompt for people like me, who can underestimate the power of sadness, comfort and compassion:
All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us. -2 Corinthians 1:3-4 (New Living Translation)
STUFF TO THINK ABOUT:
How has sadness or heartache prompted you to refocus or prioritize your life? When’s the last time you let someone be there for you during a time of great sadness? How did their presence impact your life?
Thanks for checking out this week’s post! Did you see “Inside Out”? If so, I’d love to hear your thoughts. If you think this post might bless someone else, please hit the “share” button at the top of the post. God bless!
by Barb Roose | May 25, 2015 | Christian Living/Discipleship, Women's Topics
I like to keep it real.
Why? Because it’s a compete waste of time for me to pretend that I’m all put together. My house is somewhat messy these days. I’m doing pretty well when it comes to making dinner, but where’s something tragic happening in my backyard. The weeds are winning, friends…
For the most part, I’m just trying to get through each day. Like you, I have happy days, cranky days, bossy days and sometimes, just plain ‘ole you-totally-don’t-want-to-be-around-Barb days. Yesterday, I spent the afternoon wearing dirty white socks and a bad attitude.
Sometimes, I get overwhelmed. Do you? When my life is full, that’s when the tears often overflow. I’m totally not complaining, but I hope that someone can relate to seasons of life that seem to hold more experiences that my tender heart can handle.
At times, I feel like I’m holding my life together with pieces of Scotch tape. Ever worked with Scotch tape? That stuff is so good when you’re taping paper together. However, Scotch tape is a fail if you want to join two items with any weight. That’s why Scotch tape needs to stick with paper and leave the heavy lifting to something better suited. No matter how hard we try, there is a limit to what Scotch tape can do.
Sometimes, it feels like I’m trying to fix the big, important things in life with my human effort, which often resembles Scotch tape. I can do a lot of things. But, when I’m faced with some situation that I can’t fix, my first reaction is to get mad.
from bucks.blogs.nytimes.com
What is the thing in your life that you can’t control? How do you react in that disappointing moment? How does your behavior impact your relationships and your faith?
A few months ago, I was getting frustrated over a number of situations that were out of my control. This lack of control led to disappointment and anger because what I expected didn’t match the reality of was truly happening.
After I journaled about those disappointments, I put an asterisk by the situations/events that I could control or improve. Out of seven disappointments, I could only place two asterisks. Ouch.
So, I realized I had two choices:
#1 – I could be perpetually ticked off about the situations that were out of my control;
#2 – OR, I would discipline myself to accept reality (I have no control!) and create a response to my disappointment that was consistent with reality.
Here is a phrase that I have decided to repeat when disappointment descends into my life:
Here are somethings that I try to remember:
1. Even when life is tough, I know God loves me and will take care of me. (Proverbs 3:5-6, Romans 8:31, Philippians 4:6-7)
2. God has a plan and purpose for my life. He’s in control, even when I am not. (Jeremiah 29:11)
3. Difficult circumstances are often what God uses to help me become a better, more faithful person. (Romans 5:3-5)
I don’t know what you are up against today, but I do know that there are disappointments that frustrate and anger you. I also know that dealing with disappointment is often as difficult as dealing with the situation. So, I’m going to challenge you to say this phrase: “God is in control and He will take care of it” the next time you are faced with an uncontrollable situation.
While the situation might be difficult to get through, you’ll be able to endure the difficulty with confidence in God and His ability to take care of things in a way that you never could.
If you need to let God be in control of something in your life, let us know how we can pray for you in the comments below.
Thanks for stopping by! If you think that this post would bless a friend, feel free to share it!
by Barb Roose | Apr 27, 2015 | Christian Living/Discipleship, Reflections, Women's Topics
So, last week was the Fabulous Conference and my first book signing event. If I looked up the phrase “dream-come-true” on Google, that search would have shown the image of me sitting atop a bistro chair at the Seagate Centre in downtown Toledo with a line of women waiting for me to sign their copy of my book. Seriously, how did a little brown-skinned girl with big pop-bottle glasses and two giant front teeth grow up and find herself in such an amazing situation?
Thanks to my friend, Andrea Lyn of Proclaim FM 102.3 for taking these photos and creating this lovely collage of my book signing!
Y’all, I’m still pinching myself.
Book signing was just a thrill. A straight-up thrill! I perched myself on that chair during breaks and lunch and met so many women. (That chair thrilled me because it gave my feet a break from the pressure of my fabulous 4″ heels.)
I loved looking into the eyes of each woman who stepped up with my book. I wished that I could have talked to everyone longer, but I had to keep it moving. So, I scribbled brief, heart-felt messages onto the page and tried to engage in conversation. By the way, it’s really hard to write and talk at the same time!
When I handed the book back, there were many precious moments when I heard: “Barb, do you mind taking a photo?”
My heart smiled and I replied: “Not at all! I’d love to take a photo!”
I posed for countless photos, sucking in my stomach, shifting my body toward my “good” side and giving the biggest, hearty grin that I knew how to give. I cherished each and every one of the moments.
Then, I started seeing photos crop up on social media, I began to grit my teeth. Those teeth. My teeth.
If you’ve read through the “Flaw Finding” chapter of my book, you know that I have a difficult relationship with my teeth. Once upon a time, my nickname was “Buckteeth.” Sometimes, that nickname whispers in my ear when I see photos of my smile. When that happens, I’ve got to act quick! Instead of letting that insecurity take hold, I must focus on the goodness, blessing and purpose* that my teeth bring to my life. This is how I do it:
My teeth’s GOODNESS: Well, they let me chomp-chomp on Chipotle. Yum! And, I’d look waaayyy different if I didn’t have teeth. Teeth are good.
How about the PURPOSE of my teeth? For starters, my teeth keep my tongue inside my mouth. (A friend of mine had a dog, who was missing it’s front teeth. So, the dog’s tongue always flopped out the side of its mouth. It was the cutest thing…but it’s not quite the right look for me.) I also appreciate how my teeth allow my speech to be crisp and clear, an important skill for a communicator.
Finally the BLESSING: My teeth add to my hearts’ desire to connect with others because my teeth make my smile seem bigger. People often comment on my smile. (And no one has ever commented on my teeth.)
Thrilled to have Sally Sharpe of Abingdon Women present for my first official book signing at our Fabulous Conference.
Believe it or not, I have to do a lot of self-coaching whenever I see photos of me and my big smile on social media. Using the framework of remembering the goodness, purpose and blessing of my teeth helps me to reign in the attempted run-away feelings of inadequacy that only leads to bad places.
Then, I also work to remember this: Those photos aren’t about my teeth. Just the same as you may have to remember that your photos aren’t about your hips, your hair or your wrinkles.
Those photos are all about what it meant to be present in that moment. In each of those pictures, I want to remember those precious moments and I want to create more of those precious moments, so PLEASE KEEP ASKING ME TO TAKE A PICTURE WITH YOU!
I thought that I’d share a little piece of what’s going on in my heart and mind today. Especially, since I know that many women are sifting through their Fabulous Conference pictures and looking at themselves with the same critical eye that I had to fight off earlier.
Here’s today’s thought: When looking at pictures, FOCUS on the precious moment, not the physical feature.
Q4U: Whenever you see yourself in a photo, what’s the first physical feature that you lock in on? Do you ever delete or untag yourself from photos on social media?
I’d love to hear your comments! Please share them below. If you think that this post may be a blessing to others, feel free to share it! Thanks for stopping by,
*from Chapter 7 “See God First” in Enough Already: Winning Your Ugly Struggle with Beauty by Barbara L. Roose
by Barb Roose | Apr 24, 2015 | Christian Living/Discipleship, Women's Topics
Ladies, if you are at our 2015 Fabulous Conference, I hope that you are having a great time! It’s been a pleasure and honor to serve alongside my co-leader, Lauren Miller for the past five years. Thank you for being a part of something that I will remember for the rest of my life.
The following are contains the outline and some of the notes that accompany my afternoon talk called, “The Fabulous Life.” For those who want to listen and enjoy (without the pressure of taking notes), you can follow along on this page. If you didn’t attend the Fabulous Conference, I hope that these notes can be a blessing to you, no matter where you are at in life these days.
This was the opening speech at the beginning of my talk by President Theodore Roosevelt in 1910.
The first time that I heard this quote was from 2012 & 2013 Fabulous Conference special guest, Shauna Niequist. Her good friend, Dr. Brene Brown had written a book titled Daring Greatly, a book about authenticity, vulnerability and making the choice to live wholeheartedly, no matter the obstacles in our way.
There will always be a critic. You will always have critics.
Who are your critics? How are the critics stopping you from living life to it’s fullest?
You have a story.
You have passion.
You have hopes & dreams.
You have a God-Given purpose.
Speaking of God, he is the reason why the critics don’t count. And there are four reasons why:
First, God loves you more than you could ever know.
Second, there is more to God then what you understand.
Third, God has put more in you.
Lastly, God wants more for you.
You were made to live.
You were made to thrive
You were made to love.
YOU WERE MADE TO BE FABULOUS!
What would it look like to live the Fabulous life? This morning I talked about how we live joyfully, purposely, and generously.
1. A life that is FOCUSED
It doesn’t matter if you are single, married, single again. It doesn’t matter if you have kids or not, there are a lot of things that you think and care about on a daily basis. Generally, guys can think about a lot of things, but they usually think about them one at a time.
However, I believe that women have what I like to call a “one room heart.” This means that everything that we think and care about flow into each other without boundaries and sometimes all at once.
Living the fabulous and beautiful life, requires focus. What is focus: It’s when we live knowing what we are doing and why we are here.
Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need. – Matthew 6:33
This verse calls us to start with God. When you think about what your plans are or you think about what your purposes, start with God.
“I try to avoid looking backward or forward and try to keep looking upward.”
Author, Charlotte Brontë
A life that is CONNECTED
Who are your “go-to” girls? – if you are going to show up and if you are going to go for “it”, you need cheerleaders who are wise and for you.
A life that is BROKEN & BEAUTIFUL
Kintsukuroi – I wanted to find a picture that described the beautiful life, the Fabulous life.
from Pinterest
Pottery comes in all shapes and sizes. Pottery comes with different purposes.
Yet every piece of pottery is formed from a single piece of clay that is shaped and formed and molded.
There is nothing like a beautiful piece of flawless pottery. When it is glazed and fired and the surface gleams brightly.
But, what happens to a piece of pottery when it breaks? When something breaks, our first impulse is to discard it. When something like pottery is broken, we don’t think that it has any additional usefulness.
In Japan, Kinsukuroi is a form of pottery that was created when individuals begin taking their broken pottery to an artisan in who would put the pieces back together using a special ingredient: gold
The name of the pottery means ‘beautiful for being broken.’
You look at the cracks and see what you did and God wants you to look at the cracks to see what he’s done.
God owns it. He owns the spaces where you think you’re broken.
There will never be a time when gold won’t be valuable.
-2 Corinthians 5:4
We are pressed on every side by troubles, but we are not crushed. We are perplexed, but not driven to despair. We are hunted down, but never abandoned by God. We get knocked down, but we are not destroyed.
Through suffering, our bodies continue to share in the death of Jesus so that the life of Jesus may also be seen in our bodies.
Remember…
YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL BECAUSE GOD MADE YOU.
God bless you, friends!
