by Barb Roose | Oct 30, 2018 | Christian Living/Discipleship
Earlier this summer, I shared few blog posts about what was happening with my family. At this time, it’s probably not wise to share some of the specifics of what’s been happening, only because this is still a very tender, fragile situation. If you’ve ever dealt with addiction issues, there’s already a level of out-of-controlness that goes along with this tragedy. So, rather than say too little or too much, just know that your prayers are still needed and very, very much appreciated. I trust that God is still working behind the scenes, but right now, the pain and heartache continue.
So, for the past few weeks I’ve been thinking about Isaiah 43:2 above. In God’s goodness, this is a verse was part of a message that I shared about Shadrach, Meschah and Abendego (Daniel 3) that I taught on over the weekend at the New Antioch Women’s Retreat in Maryland. In their story, these godly men took a stand for their faith and ended up in a firey furnace.
Where do you feel the heat of the fire in your life? One thing is for sure, when we feel the heat of the fire, we often feel that it’s going to kill us, right?! Perhaps you feel the heat of a financial crisis that you can’t get out of. Maybe you feel the heat of an uneasy employment situation because you aren’t sure about your job security. If you’re like me, you feel the intense hot heat of a personal crisis and you just want God to put out the fire so that you can feel relief.
Sometimes, however, God allows us to feel the heat so that we will turn to Him for help. In the retreat this weekend, I said this: God is our firefighter!
There are three lessons that I think about Isaiah 43:2:
1. God allows us to experience pain and pressure.
This is different than saying that God is the one who does bad things to us. Rather, we live in a sinful world where bad things happen to good people and sometimes, God does allow us to experience pain that frankly, doesn’t always feel fair.
2. Just because you are facing the fire today doesn’t mean that it’s your fault.
Read Daniel 3 and the story of Shadrach, Meshach and Abendego. These guys loved God and served him, yet, their faith led to their fiery situation.
Don’t let judgmental people tell you that your hardship is as a result of something that you’ve done. We all face hardship and sometimes, there is no explanation for it.
Don’t beat yourself up. And even if you started the fire through bad financial decisions or an inappropriate relationship, hear this: God is still God. Turn to Him and give Him back control of your life so that He can lead you through the fire. There may be places where you’ve experienced self-inflicted pain, but God can take those places and give you purpose and redemption!
3. When you’re in the fire, stay calm!
What’s the first rule when someone catches on fire? Stop. Remember in school when they taught us to “stop, drop and roll” if our clothes caught on fire. Running away only spreads the fire, but when we stop, drop and roll, that’s how we smother it. When we feel the heat of the trials in our lives, we need to stop instead of running away from God. Isaiah 40:31 says, “They that wait on the Lord will renew their strength.”
We turn toward God, pray and study His word. God will take care of us and fight the fire for us.
These are the lessons that I cling to these days as I walk through the heat of my personal crisis. What about you? Which one of these three lessons do you need to remember today?
by Barb Roose | Mar 27, 2018 | Christian Living/Discipleship, Joshua & Winning the Worry Battle
By Barb Roose
For most of my adult life, I thought that being a worrier was a sign that I cared about others.
If I worried about someone that meant that I cared about their safety and happiness. So, I would devote my mental energy to identifying all of the ways that my family or friends might miss optimum happiness, hurt or kill themselves. It didn’t matter if they were thinking about trying a new hairstyle or daring to attend a college across the country, I was going to point out everything that could possibly go wrong so that they could avoid a tragedy.
But, what happens to us when we spend our time thinking about all of the things that could hurt, harm or kill the people in our lives? Eventually, our minds get stuck in that kind of worst-case scenario thinking. Did you know that 85% of what we’re afraid of happening never actually happens? So, when you’re churning all of the “what-if” scenarios about your daughter going on a missions’ trip or your son heading off to college, 85% of what you are stressing out about won’t happen.
Why do we believe that worrying is a symbol of caring for others?
If we worry about people because we care about them, then why does worry only produce negative feelings in us? I don’t know about you, but the more I allowed myself to worry, the more trapped I felt in a world of worry. Instead of feeling happiness for the people that I loved, I began to only feel fear, which opposes and tries to suffocate the power of love.
Here are three ways that worry makes us feel crazy:
1. Worry pretends to be productive.
When nothing changes, you feel crazy because you thought that by worrying you were actually doing something to make positive change happen.
2. Worry doesn’t have to work hard work to take over your mind.
Worry feels like your subscription to Netflix. It’s always available and once you begin streaming WorryFlix, you end up binge-worrying your entire life before you know it.
3. Worry produces horrible feelings that stress you out during the day and keep you up at night.
Isn’t it amazing how something in your mind makes your body respond in real ways? While you’re imagining the worst, your heart is racing and you feel real fear. Have you ever finished worrying and REAL tears were streaming down your face? And it was all in your imagination…
How worry made me feel crazy and out of control…
Seventeen years ago, my battle with worry peaked when one of my kids was struggling at school. Her teacher sent home notes and we had numerous meetings. I loved my sweet girl, but my fear over her future consumed me. Dozens of “what if” worst case scenarios drove me crazy! For weeks, I stressed out over my child’s health during the day and I paced the floor because I couldn’t sleep at night. Like Jesus said in Matthew 6:27, all of my worries didn’t add a single quality moment to my life or my child’s life.
So, what changed? I had to admit that worry was my flawed way of playing God instead of taking the time to pray to God.
Then, I had to replace those places in my mind where worry got good and comfortable with God’s Word. I had to commit myself to filling my brain with Bible verses that spoke against worry like this one:
Give all your worries and cares to God, for He cares about you.
—1 Peter 5:7
If you’ve always been a worrier, can I suggest that you either memorize this verse or type it into your cell phone. Whenever worry tries to take up space in your life, allow God to use this verse to kick that worry out of your mind and replace it with peace. Trust me, it does work! But, you’ve got to put the work into it!
Do I still worry at times? Yes! I’ll always have to fight against worry, but I don’t have to live as a worrier.
When you know how to use God’s Word to win against worry, you will wake up energized every day and excited about life because you know that God will give you victory over any worry that comes your way. Don’t waste another day of your life fighting a losing worry battle!
Don’t waste another day of your life fighting a losing worry battle!
LEAVE A COMMENT BELOW: Are you a worrier? What things do you worry about most?
About Barb Roose…
Barb loves reaching women and teaching them to win at life with God-empowered strength and dignity. She is the author of multiple books and Bible studies, including April 2018 releases, Joshua: Winning the Worry Battle (Bible study) and Winning the Worry Battle. She is the host of the Better Together Podcast and loves diving into tough topics that women want to know. Barb and her husband, Matt, are the parents of three daughters. Barb loves Jesus, travel, her FitBit, chocolate-peanut butter ice cream, and fabulous high heel shoes.
by Barb Roose | Jan 16, 2018 | Christian Living/Discipleship
Hi everyone!
I've got exciting news to share with you about some incredible ministry doors that God has opened for me in 2018. Have you ever had that "But, God" moment? It's that moment that only God can make happen. When we experience a "But, God" moment, it usually leaves our jaw on the ground and a stunned looked on our face. I get to share two "But, God" opportunities with you. Here's the best part: You can join me and be a part of these exciting opportunities, too!
Before I get into my news - my friend, I want to hear from YOU. We're just a few weeks into the new year and I know that many of you are looking forward to claiming new ground in your personal, relational and spiritual lives. I'm still working on my goals for the year, but I'm considering coming up with promises verses to hold onto for the year. I'd love to know what you're working toward or hoping for this year? Share your comment below.
- Did you decide on a New Year's Resolution?
- Have you chosen your special word for 2018?
- What do you want God to do in your life that only He can do?
Now, about that exciting news...You're hearing it before everyone else on social media!
First, I'm excited to announce that I'll be guest speaking on the 2018 Aspire Women's Event, a national conference tour. Aspire is a 1 night, 3-hour event just for women, full of laughter, learning, stories and music. It is like a weekend retreat packed into one evening with National Speakers, Authors, Comedians, and Worship. I'll be speaking on April 20, 21 and 22 in Cincinnati, OH, Medina, OH and Pittsburgh, PA with well-known comedian Anita Renfroe and others. Sooo exciting!
Scroll down to get information on the dates. Friends, please share this news with your women's ministry leader, small group leader or pastor's wife. If your church doesn't have a women's event planned, join an Aspire Event near you. The full list of 2018 Aspire Events across the country, just click here! (But, you know that I'd love to see you at one of my Aspire Events, right?!)
Find out more! Click the city below to get complete event information. You can download flyers and posters, too!
Cincinnati, OH - April 20, 2018
Medina, OH - April 21, 2018
Pittsburg, PA - April 22, 2018
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Find Joy Ladies Night Out National Tour
I'm also appearing with the Finding Joy Ladies Night Out Tour in the following cities: Elkhart, IN, Nashville, TN and Raleigh, NC.
My friend, Lauren Gaskill is a dynamic leader and this is her third year hosting Finding Joy Ladies Night Out in select cities, but now, Finding Joy is going on tour across the country. This fall tour features a slate of spectacular speakers that love Jesus and you! Tickets are now on sale for the first ever Finding Joy Ladies Night Out National Tour! Join us for a night of joy, food, fellowship and fun: itickets.com/findingjoy
So, that's a lot of exciting news for a Tuesday morning, but I wanted to share it with you first before announcing it on social media. Would you like to join me for an Aspire Event or a Finding Joy event in 2018? If so, let me know which city.
Between both tour events, other speaking events and the launch of my new book and Bible study, 2018 is off to an exciting start. Yet, as you know I'm still moving through the grieving process of losing my dad as well as a few other challenges in life that keep me on my knees. Thank you for your on-going prayers for me and my family.
Don't forget to share your 2018 plans with me in the comments below! Looking forward to hearing from you 🙂
Love,
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by Barb Roose | Nov 26, 2017 | Christian Living/Discipleship
At midnight on the day after Thanksgiving, my oldest daughter sailed down the stairs with her iPod on full blast with Christmas music. “It’s finally time!” she proclaimed.
In my house, all Christmas music is banned until the day after Thanksgiving. I don’t have anything against Christmas music, but I can only hear Mariah Carey’s “All I Want for Christmas is You” so many times before I feel a little Grinchy inside.
Now it’s Christmas season.
This year, I’m grappling with a few tensions that most of you understand: First, how do I celebrate the holiday without making myself crazy?
Next, I’m dealing with the recent loss of my father, so I’m still adjusting to that new normal in my life. How do I balance the time that I need to grieve with desire to spend time celebrating one of the wonderful times of the year with friends and family?
For the past few years, I’ve worked on actually planning how I want to experience the weeks between Thanksgiving and New Years’. This planning isn’t about what I want to do, but who do I want to be during this amped up, non-stop season.
Here are a few goals that I try to hold onto each Christmas season. Perhaps, one or two of these might inspire you:
1. Let Christmas begin IN you.
People talk about letting Christmas begin WITH them, like taking the first step. But, what if you and I decided that our Christmas was already complete because of Christ? If our Christmas was already complete, then we can reject the pressure of to-lists, unrealistic expectations, and the materialistic allure of more, more, more. Letting Christmas begin IN me is the attitude that Jesus came to fill in my deepest longings and each day I will celebrate that over everything else.
2. Be JoyFULL.
The perfect Christmas family photo will look great on Facebook, but it won’t fill your heart. Planning the perfect Christmas dinner might make you happy in the moment, but what about after the meal is over?
Gratitude will fill the empty place in your heart, even if the kids can’t make it home this year or there’s less on the tree. Gratitude keeps you from chasing the crazy of Christmas.
Start filling up with joy by listing 25 blessings each day, like enjoying a hot cup of coffee or a well-timed hug from a friend. Making a list of 25 causes you to dig deep and really pay attention to what God is doing all around you that you’ve likely missed.
3. Be PeaceFULL
Be filled with calm that comes from knowing that you are only in control of one thing this Christmas season: you.
We get all crazy during the holidays because we think everything needs to be done. Everything doesn’t need to be done and we don’t need to do it.
If you want to do something, then do it. If you have to do something, that’s another thing. But, we don’t need to be Christmas martyrs. If someone at school doesn’t sign up to bring cookies and you don’t like to bake them, don’t sign up. The kids won’t die without the cookies. Same for the office or family gathering.
For all you self-proclaimed martyrs out there, here’s one of my favorite movie lines every from Dolly Parton’s character in the movie Straight Talk: “Get off the cross, honey. Somebody needs the wood.”
4. Be HopeFULL
Even as our world feels crazy and out-of-control, the people in Jesus’ time felt the same about Roman rule. Yet, hope was born in manager and most of the world never knew it. The same applies today. We have hope and the world doesn’t yet know the same hope that we have. When you live with hope, those around you take notice. One of the greatest gifts that you can give this Christmas season is to share Jesus’ hope with those around you.
I’d love to hear from you! Post a comment below and share: Are you dealing with difficult circumstances this year? Which one of the four suggestions above is most helpful for you to focus on this year?
Pssst…looking for a gift idea for your daughter, niece, granddaughter or friend. Click here for a special gift offer!
by Barb Roose | Feb 13, 2017 | Christian Living/Discipleship, Women's Topics
By Barb Roose
When’s the last time that you considered what it meant for your body to be the temple of the Holy Spirit?
I began contemplating 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 this weekend after my third BIG bowl of luscious, buttery pecan ice cream. There wasn’t anything sinful about eating ice cream, but when I started choosing to eat ice cream over real food, it was time for a reality check. In fact, I got a shock when I flipped over the ice cream container to review the nutritional information. Holy Moly, Batman!
Every half-cup serving contained a whopping 15 grams of fat and 240 calories. No wonder it tasted so good!
But just because it tasted good, didn’t mean that it was good for me.
When we consider the Apostle Paul’s teaching in 1 Corinthians 6:19-20, we’re reminded that our bodies are not our own. As believers, we’ve chosen to offer our bodies as living sacrifices (Romans 12:1-2) in light of what Jesus Christ has done for us on the cross. So, while my temple may be named ‘Barbara” on my driver’s license and social security card, God owns my body.
With that in mind, I must determine if what I eat, drink, watch or wear will honor God’s authority over my body or not.
I’m not talking about following strict rules to gain God’s favor. Instead, it’s about the kind of relationship that I want to have with God. I love how God give me Himself, as well as a life of freedom and purpose. Since I want God to do more in me and through me, I must stay attune to God’s leadings in how I steward the temple that He’s given to me.
Because when we’re careless about the body that God has created for us, we’re essentially trashing our temple.
Here are a few “temple topics” that come to mind when I think about how I honor God with the body that He’s given to me.
Temple Topic #1: Movies
I have a vivid imagination. Anything that I see sticks in my mind for a very, very long time. Years ago, I felt that any movie rated over PG-13 had too much mind clutter for me. So, I made the decision to not allow extreme content in my mind.
Now, am I telling you that any movie over PG-13 is wrong or sinful? Nope. I’m just telling you that my temple mind can’t handle PG-13 or above. You’ve got to decide how God calls you to steward your temple.
Temple Topic #2: Exercise
Ephesians 2:10 reminds us that God has created us to do good works. But, I’m concerned that too many of our lady temples are too tired and out of shape to do the work that God has called us to do. Even if you’ve got health limitations, are you treating your temple in a way that allows you to have as much energy as needed to serve where God calls?
I don’t love to exercise, but I need to have a healthy body because as God’s ambassador, He’s got things for me to do. So, I want to stay stretched and strong to the best of my ability. So, I get up and move my temple on a regular basis to get it stretched and strong.
Temple Topic #3: Sleep
When my husband began working nights last summer, my sleep schedule fell apart. My cherished eight hours per night plummeted to less than six hours per night. It didn’t take long for me to feel sluggish and grumpy. My temple needed more shut-eye!
It took some trial and error, but I now back on track. My Fit Bit gives me an honest and accurate record of how much sleep I’m actually getting. I started wearing a sleep mask and ear plugs so that I wouldn’t awaken at 3 or 4am when my husband got home.
A well-rested temple is important. How’s your temple doing in this area?
And finally…food.
I know that I’m getting up into some of your business right here. But, as God’s beautiful daughter, is it time for you to put a microscope over what you’ve been eating lately? Are you eating in a way that honors God’s authority over your body? Again, this isn’t trying to please God by following a bunch of rules. Jesus already freed us from that! Rather, ask yourself if you’ve consulted God lately about your eating or drinking habits. If so, are you walking in obedience to God’s leading in that area of your life?
If we truly believe that God has put more in us and that God wants more for us, then it’s up to us to pay attention to our temples and listen for how God wants us to use them.
QUESTION: Is taking care of yourself a struggle for you? What gets in the way of good self-care?
by Barb Roose | Jan 9, 2017 | Christian Living/Discipleship, Women's Topics
by Barb Roose
I knew something was up when I received a link to the same blog post from several women’s Bible study leaders from around the country. The writer sent out a plea to women’s ministry leaders asking them to stop telling women that they are beautiful if that beauty message wasn’t tied to the gospel. Her blog connected with women across the country. What caught my attention were the comments from her readers. There were a lot of opinions and negative feelings out there about how beauty was addressed at women’s conferences and how beauty is taught by women’s ministry leaders.
As a communicator who speaks and writes about Christ-centered identity and beauty, I’ve heard women’s ministry leaders question whether beauty is a worthy spiritual topic. Some even rate beauty as watery spiritual milk rather than stick-to-the-bones spiritual meat. There’s a confusion about how we should talk about beauty, so without a clear way forward, women’s ministry leaders may settle for the simple “You are beautiful” cheer with no foundation or refuse to address the topic of beauty for fear of criticism from other Christians.
In either case, I fear that those two positions could actually hinder the effectiveness of women’s ministry now and into the next generation.
As long as we’re silent or hostile about talking about beauty, Satan will own the beauty dialogue. He already does. We’re seeing the results of his deception everywhere. There’s nothing fluffy or cute about beauty. The topic of beauty has become a bloody battlefield. Young girls are being bullied to death over their looks or weight. The lure of online fame compels our daughters and granddaughters to mimic the lifestyles of those that our culture worships and adores.
So, what should we be teaching women, both Christian and non-Christian women, about beauty? I believe that there are two things we must teach:
First, beauty is a topic that is wholly biblical!
Let’s stop treating the topic of beauty like an ugly scriptural stepsister. Did you know that the words “beauty” and “beautiful” appear in the Bible over 100 times?* In fact, beauty is a quality associated with the character of God, meaning that He has no ugliness or distortion.
One thing I ask from the Lord, this only do I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze on the beauty of the Lord and to seek him in his temple. –Psalm 27:4 NIV
The Bible talks about beauty on many levels and its impact on our lives. At its worst, we see how beauty fueled Rachel and Leah’s baby daddy rivalry and caused Abraham to fear for his life. At its best, God used beauty to influence the selection of Esther as Queen as well as her gentle and quiet inner beauty to gain favor with the king to save the Jewish people.
For a topic that is written about in many ways in scripture, it feels like we’re more in touch with culture’s perspective on beauty than God’s perspective. We define beauty by what we see in advertisements, social media “likes” and celebrity chatter. As Christian women, we find all of those expressions of beauty distasteful. But we don’t really have a good scriptural foundation, so we declare beauty a bad word.
Last week I interviewed Christian fashion expert Shari Braendel on my Better Together podcast. Shari is a bold woman of faith and considered America’s leading voice in fashion, beauty and dignity for Christian women. Yet she has been criticized by Christians who don’t believe that outer beauty is a spiritual topic that Christian women should care about. Regardless, over the past 12 years, God has used Shari to speak hope, truth and freedom to thousands upon thousands of women.
FULL DISCLOSURE: I’m a Christian women’s speaker and author who stands on platforms around the country and boldly tells women that they are beautiful because God created them. It’s biblical and needs to be said. Why? Because most women have no idea how God sees them! Far too women see themselves dipped in ugliness, guilt and shame over sin-related life experiences—some at the hands of another.
Women’s ministry leaders, we can tell a woman that she’s beautiful AND tell her that she is in need of a Savior. We can tell her about who God created her to be and how Jesus came to die so that she could experience life to fullest without guilt or shame. We can and should give both of those messages and repeat them as often as possible. Just the same as we never stop saying Jesus loves you because we think people should get it by now, we can never assume that a woman always remembers that her beautiful identity is solidified in God.
Secondly, when the Bible talks about beauty, it’s addressing both inner AND outer beauty.
When it comes to beauty, what’s on the inside does matter most, but it’s not the only thing that matters.
We’ve gotten in a habit of elevating inner beauty because of a few verses (Proverbs 31: 30 and 1 Peter 3:3-5) and pretending that we don’t care about outer beauty or that it’s bad. But God cares about both.
Who created the sunsets, flowers and rainbows that we obsessively photograph and post to social media? God created them to show us what He thinks about physical beauty.
In Genesis 1, God creates our physical world and the first humans. How often do we see the phrase “God saw that it was good” in this chapter? When God created the sun, moon, stars, trees, flowers and animals, God looked at their physical structure. The Hebrew word for good is towb, which is translated beautiful.
And God saw that it was beautiful.
In a world where women are targeted with 400-600 media advertisements a day, we cannot forget that God is the Creator of beauty, both inner AND outer beauty.
And what about us? What about adult Christian women? How many of us are silently bearing the scars and shame of outer-beauty issues? Sister, I know that you love Jesus. But I also know that you’ve probably stood in front of the mirror at one time or another whispering that you are “fat” or “ugly.” If God were standing next to you, how would you explain that?
So, here’s an incredible opportunity for us to reach women with the hope and freedom of Christ IF we remember the big picture:
Talking about beauty is an open door to talk about redemption and restoration.
In Matthew 6, Jesus teaches a crowd on a hillside. He uses the beauty of flowers as a teaching tool to remind us of how God sees us and cares about our physical needs. Jesus also refocuses our perspective:
31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. –Matthew 6:31-33
Raise your hand if you’ve ever felt angst, guilt or shame over “What did I just eat or drink?” or “For the love, my pants are too small. What am I going to wear today?”
First, Jesus acknowledges the struggle. Then, He tells us what to do. For every struggle, Jesus shows us the solution: See God first.
There’s a lesson in that for women’s ministry leaders, small group leaders and all mature Christian women: Acknowledge your struggle. Share Jesus’ solution.
How can the women in our churches and communities come to Christ and confess their guilt and shame if we’re silent about ours?
Maybe this is why a certain segment of women aren’t registering for conferences or retreats. When a broken woman attends an event and all she can see are well-dressed, plastic-smiling women that look shiny and perfect, she’ll struggle to relate and leave still starving for connection.
If you plan women’s events, remember that women attend conferences because they want to find solutions for what’s missing, broken or changed in their lives.
Women don’t want perfect. Women want real. Real answers. Real stories. Real women who aren’t trying to market their Pin-Perfect lives.
If you want to draw women into your next women’s event, then think about what the women in your church and community are praying about. Where are they begging God to show up in their lives? Match up those prayers with God’s hope and truth. Now, those are the topics to plan around and invite speakers to address.
And to us speakers, we’ve got to show up and tell our “But for Jesus” stories. If we’re going to stand on the platform, it’s because we’ve got a story of how Jesus rescued us from the pit. We’ve got to talk about surrender and sanctification so that the women can see that we’re putting one foot in front of the other just like they are.
And we’ve got to talk about beauty.
When I talk about the topic of beauty, I begin with a photo of what I look like first thing in the morning. Why? Because I may show up to an event looking put together, but I don’t want the women in the audience to think that’s how I roll 24/7. They need to see the “before-and-after Barb.” I show them the physical before-and-after and talk about my spiritual before-and-after. I want every woman to know that what Jesus did for me, He can do the same for her.
I dream of the day when every Christian woman has the strength and conviction to also declare that she is beautiful—not just for her sake, but also so that she can be the city on a hill to reach the millions and millions of women out there lost in the land of guilt and shame.
Just to make sure that you know, I’m going to keep telling women that they are beautiful. I don’t need to know your name in order to look you in the eyes and tell you that you are beautiful. I can do it authentically and truthfully because God’s Word guarantees the truth of that statement with 100% certainty.
Thanks for stopping by and checking out this post. I’d love to hear your thoughts. Share your comments below.
*NIV version
