by Barb Roose | Apr 25, 2018 | Joshua & Winning the Worry Battle
Last week was an incredible week! On Tuesday, I celebrated the launch of my new Bible study, Joshua: Winning the Worry Battle AND my new book, Winning the Worry Battle. It was a thrill to partner with the lead pastor of my church, Ben Snyder, to host a launch event titled, “Finding Freedom from Worry and Anxiety” Event on Tuesday, April 17. Here’s a quick slideshow of some of the fun photos from last week. (Pictures change every six seconds 🙂
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Over 400 people attended the one-hour event at my church and the event ran on Facebook Live with over 1700 views. Rather than just host a “buy my book” event, I dreamed of encouraging and equipping people to win their worry battle. Ben and I talked about the spiritual impact of worry and anxiety. My friend and church communications director, Eric, was our emcee and he worked behind the scenes to help me organize the entire night. I interviewed my friend and fellow leader, Lauren Snyder. Eight years ago, Lauren had to fight her own worry battle when a friend of hers passed away after battling cancer. Lauren talked about how God led her toward health and wholeness with the help of her healthcare provider, wise voices in her life, and an ongoing commitment to community and accountability.
After the Tuesday night launch event, I joined the Aspire Women Events tour for three days of events in Cincinnati, Medina, and Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. What a thrill! Holy moly friends, it was such a wonderful experience! Not only did I have a chance to share a message from my new Joshua Bible study and Winning the Worry Battle book, but I partnered in ministry with some extraordinary women. Aspire Events emcee and worship leader, Mia Koehne has an incredible talent for music and an inspiring personal story. Comedians Anita Renfroe and Kristin Weber made my face cheeks hurt with their hysterical stories and great songs.
The cherry on top of every event is connecting with the ladies, whether they stop by to buy a book or just want to say “hi.” God uses the women that I meet to bless me, encourage me, and remind me of just how much God takes care of us.
Friends, for those who have been praying for me over these months, thank you. You know that it’s been a long road. Writing two books in less than a year, losing my dad, and navigating a few other life situations has made for quite challenging year. So, to God to be the glory! He has brought me through and I am celebrating with you!
Thank you all for your love and support!
by Barb Roose | Apr 10, 2018 | Better Together Podcast
“Focus on the person you are fighting for, not the person you are fighting with.” -John Geurin
Do you have a secret that you’re keeping from your husband? Some of us might sneak in a few pairs of shoes inside brown grocery bag or perhaps there is a secret Amazon account attached to an off-the-radar credit card, secrets are never good for a relationship.
But what about a bigger secret?
Are you hiding secret feelings from your husband about the guy at the office who gives great shoulder rubs?
Do you feel a growing affection for your neighbor who always has time to fix something when your hubby is busy?
On this episode of the Better Together podcast, I’m talking with speaker and author Shannon Geurin. Shannon and her husband, John live in Colorado and they are parents of two daughters.
Twelve years ago, Shannon began an emotional affair with a man that led to a physical affair. As Shannon says, “and that affair led me to do the unthinkable. I was going to leave my family – husband and my little girls.”
This is a raw conversation, friends. Shannon speaks with humility about the mistakes that she made, the lies that she believed, the forgiveness that she received, and the long five-year road that she walked with her husband after her affair.
Even if you think that it isn’t possible for you to even find yourself in Shannon’s situation, there are plenty of other ways in life when we can get off-track in life. Listen as Shannon shares not only the warnings signs, but take heart and have hope as Shannon also shares how you can find your way back if you’ve made big mistakes and you’re wondering if you can ever overcome them. In Jesus’ name, you can!
THREE STEPS TOWARD FORGIVENESS & RESTORATION:
- Surround yourself with people who are supporting the decision that you are making.
- Write down God’s promises and post them where they can encourage you.
- Don’t let shame and guilt rob you of God’s forgiveness and your future.
LINKS FROM TODAY’S SHOW:
Connect with Shannon: Email | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest
Finding Joy Ladies Night Out Tickets – click here
Joshua: Winning the Worry Battle Bible Study by Barb Roose
by Barb Roose | Apr 3, 2018 | Better Together Podcast
I love the word “gutsy.”
In fact, a gutsy woman is always inspiring to me! She’s the kind of gal who knows that the odds are stacked against her, but she makes a big move anyways. In a world where women are fighting against so much, we need brave, courageous women who are willing to risk it all for something better.
Sometimes, the greatest gutsiest risk we’ll ever take is the one that involves confronting our painful past and choosing to walk the road of healing.
Today, my Better Together podcast guest is Jennifer Renee Watson. I caught up with Jennifer as she was hiding out in a hotel room writing her upcoming book called Freedom: The Gutsy Pursuit of Breakthrough and Life Beyond It” (February 2019). Jennifer is a speaker, writer, pastor’s wife, student ministries leader, and mother of two. Her life journey has been one of brokenness and healing. Now, Jennifer’s passion is to equip others to take their healing journey as well.
As the child of an alcoholic and divorce, Jennifer spent her younger years trying to cope with the ache and pain of the loss of her dad to addiction and the break-up of her family. “My dad had such a great heart and loved people but over the years, his addiction became bigger and louder than who he was as a man.”
Jennifer came to faith in Christ when she was 11 years old. Her new life and hope in Christ helped Jennifer to see that she needed to deal with the brokenness in her life. “When I was in my teen years, I worked hard to deal with my junk. I wrote stories, angry poetry, danced. I needed an outlet to work through things.” Not only that, but young Jennifer made one of her first gutsy moves in life and said “yes” when she felt God putting a life of ministry on her heart.
During today’s conversation, Jennifer talks through what her “healing journey” looked like. Most of all, Jennifer tells us about the powerful way that she knew that healing had taken place when she got the word that her dad died three years ago.
There are times when we hear women talk about the shock-n-awe brokenness of their lives, but Jennifer longs for us to not let our brokenness define us. Rather, she invites us to learn how to offer the fractured parts of our lives to God and let those broken places be a platform to glorify Him.
On today’s Better Together Podcast, Jennifer and I discuss:
- What it means to be a “gutsy” woman;
- How you can use creative outlets to work through your junk;
- What you need in order to take a “healing journey”;
- How to let your brokenness glorify God instead of letting it define your life.
LINKS FROM TODAY’S EPISODE
Jennifer Renee Watson website | Facebook
Finding Joy Ladies Night Out Tickets – click here
LEAVE A COMMENT: Who is the gutsiest woman that you know? Tell us about her and how she inspires you.
About your host…
Barb Roose is the host of the Better Together podcast. She’s passionate about teaching women how to win at life with strength and dignity. Barb’s new book, Winning the Worry Battle and her new six-week Bible study on the book of Joshua: Winning the Worry Battle release in April 2018. Both products are available at your favorite online retailers and stores across the country.
by Barb Roose | Mar 27, 2018 | Christian Living/Discipleship, Joshua & Winning the Worry Battle
By Barb Roose
For most of my adult life, I thought that being a worrier was a sign that I cared about others.
If I worried about someone that meant that I cared about their safety and happiness. So, I would devote my mental energy to identifying all of the ways that my family or friends might miss optimum happiness, hurt or kill themselves. It didn’t matter if they were thinking about trying a new hairstyle or daring to attend a college across the country, I was going to point out everything that could possibly go wrong so that they could avoid a tragedy.
But, what happens to us when we spend our time thinking about all of the things that could hurt, harm or kill the people in our lives? Eventually, our minds get stuck in that kind of worst-case scenario thinking. Did you know that 85% of what we’re afraid of happening never actually happens? So, when you’re churning all of the “what-if” scenarios about your daughter going on a missions’ trip or your son heading off to college, 85% of what you are stressing out about won’t happen.
Why do we believe that worrying is a symbol of caring for others?
If we worry about people because we care about them, then why does worry only produce negative feelings in us? I don’t know about you, but the more I allowed myself to worry, the more trapped I felt in a world of worry. Instead of feeling happiness for the people that I loved, I began to only feel fear, which opposes and tries to suffocate the power of love.
Here are three ways that worry makes us feel crazy:
1. Worry pretends to be productive.
When nothing changes, you feel crazy because you thought that by worrying you were actually doing something to make positive change happen.
2. Worry doesn’t have to work hard work to take over your mind.
Worry feels like your subscription to Netflix. It’s always available and once you begin streaming WorryFlix, you end up binge-worrying your entire life before you know it.
3. Worry produces horrible feelings that stress you out during the day and keep you up at night.
Isn’t it amazing how something in your mind makes your body respond in real ways? While you’re imagining the worst, your heart is racing and you feel real fear. Have you ever finished worrying and REAL tears were streaming down your face? And it was all in your imagination…
How worry made me feel crazy and out of control…
Seventeen years ago, my battle with worry peaked when one of my kids was struggling at school. Her teacher sent home notes and we had numerous meetings. I loved my sweet girl, but my fear over her future consumed me. Dozens of “what if” worst case scenarios drove me crazy! For weeks, I stressed out over my child’s health during the day and I paced the floor because I couldn’t sleep at night. Like Jesus said in Matthew 6:27, all of my worries didn’t add a single quality moment to my life or my child’s life.
So, what changed? I had to admit that worry was my flawed way of playing God instead of taking the time to pray to God.
Then, I had to replace those places in my mind where worry got good and comfortable with God’s Word. I had to commit myself to filling my brain with Bible verses that spoke against worry like this one:
Give all your worries and cares to God, for He cares about you.
—1 Peter 5:7
If you’ve always been a worrier, can I suggest that you either memorize this verse or type it into your cell phone. Whenever worry tries to take up space in your life, allow God to use this verse to kick that worry out of your mind and replace it with peace. Trust me, it does work! But, you’ve got to put the work into it!
Do I still worry at times? Yes! I’ll always have to fight against worry, but I don’t have to live as a worrier.
When you know how to use God’s Word to win against worry, you will wake up energized every day and excited about life because you know that God will give you victory over any worry that comes your way. Don’t waste another day of your life fighting a losing worry battle!
Don’t waste another day of your life fighting a losing worry battle!
LEAVE A COMMENT BELOW: Are you a worrier? What things do you worry about most?
About Barb Roose…
Barb loves reaching women and teaching them to win at life with God-empowered strength and dignity. She is the author of multiple books and Bible studies, including April 2018 releases, Joshua: Winning the Worry Battle (Bible study) and Winning the Worry Battle. She is the host of the Better Together Podcast and loves diving into tough topics that women want to know. Barb and her husband, Matt, are the parents of three daughters. Barb loves Jesus, travel, her FitBit, chocolate-peanut butter ice cream, and fabulous high heel shoes.
by Barb Roose | Mar 20, 2018 | Better Together Podcast, Uncategorized
“On what should have been the most beautiful day of my life, a switch flipped in my body?”
Have you or someone you know struggled with chronic pain? For 20 years, speaker and author, Melinda Means fought chronic pain and autoimmune disorders that she jokingly referred as the “gift that keeps on giving.”
Melinda is the author of the book, Invisible Wounds: Hope While You are Hurting. As we talked today, she reflects on the years of constant doctors appointments, diseases, and treatments, she felt like the woman in New Testament who struggled with uncontrolled bleeding for 12 years (Mark 5).
Raging within, Melinda’s suffering body was a spiritual wound that spread deep and wide. “I didn’t understand how God could love me and still let me suffer. I know that my earthly father would have healed me from my debilitating pain if he could. So, if my earthly father would heal me because beloved me, then why wouldn’t my heavenly father heal me?”
During my conversation with Melinda, we talk with great candor about the difficult questions that we ask God when we’re in physical, emotional, or spiritual pain. If you’ve ever grappled with questions like why God hasn’t taken away your pain or why your prayers for healing have gone unanswered, then today’s podcast conversation is for you.
What you’ll hear in this week’s podcast:
- The story of Melinda’s 20-year struggle with chronic pain and spiritual struggle with her faith;
- What happened when Melinda prayed a radical prayer in the midst of her pain;
- The ONE thing that you can do if you are in the midst of a physical/spiritual struggle;
- A beautiful new gift God bestowed on Melinda that you can enjoy and download for yourself!
PODCAST EPISODE RESOURCES:
Melinda’s website | Melinda’s book | Melinda’s Facebook page
Finding Joy Ladies Night Out Tickets on iTickets
SHARE YOUR STORY: Are you dealing with something in your life that God hasn’t healed yet? Maybe it’s a chronic illness, a broken relationship, or an unfilled longing that keeps breaking your heart. Share your story in the comments below and bring home to another person who is listening today.
by Barb Roose | Mar 14, 2018 | Joshua & Winning the Worry Battle
By Barb Roose
Over the past 15 years, I’ve learned a lot about how to allow God to give me victory over fear and worry. I created the C.A.L.M. Technique for myself to reduce my physical distress so that I could pray. This easy-to-use tool works to slow down my heart rate, break the pattern of negative thinking, and relax my body. Then, I can invite God into my distress and ask Him to fight my battles for me. The C.A.L.M Technique isn’t just a neat idea – I use it! (I used it last week.) Recently, I had a chance to teach it to the folks at my church and that was pretty cool. Would you like to learn it?
C.A.L.M. Technique
- Count to 10 (Inhale on the number; Exhale the word MISSISSIPPI)
- Acknowledge God’s presence by saying: God, I know that You’re here with me right now.
- List – Tell God what you are afraid of or worried about
- Meditate – Keep repeating the following: God is here and He will take care of me/this.
When it comes to the counting, you will need to boss your emotions so that you can push your count to 10. Those supercharged emotions will definitely fight the technique. But, stick with it because it does work! This is one of those tools that becomes more effective the more you use it. Your body will calm down. I love this tool because it equips us to walk in the blessing of God’s promise in Joshua 1:9:
The point of this exercise is to reduce your physical distress and open up a conversation with God. I love this tool because it equips us to walk in the blessing of God’s promise in Joshua 1:9: “This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”
I don’t know what’s on your mind today. But, if you’re prone to meltdowns like me, practice the C.A.L.M. technique a few times so that you can use this tool to help you calm down during anxious times and connect with the God who promises to take care of you.
*Looking for MORE tools? Order my new book, Winning the Worry Battle releasing next month for even more practical tools to help you fight your worry battle! Click here to find out where you can order your book today!
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by Barb Roose | Mar 7, 2018 | Better Together Podcast
“They took me into the counseling room. The doctor gently told me that they tried everything that they could, but they were not able to revive my husband. So, I went home to do the hardest thing that I ever had to do.”
Lisa Appelo’s life changed forever in just one night.
On this new episode of Better Together podcast, I have a heartbreaking, yet hope–filled conversation with writer and speaker, Lisa Appelo. She’s a Florida native and a homeschooling mom to seven kids, now aged 27 to 10.
During our interview, Lisa tells us about the night in summer 2011 when she woke up in the middle of the night and realized that her 47-year old husband Dan was having a heart attack. After the paramedics took her husband to the hospital, Lisa went upstairs and noticed her kids huddled together with their arms around each other.
Not only did Lisa face the devastating loss of her high-school sweetheart husband, but the reality of being alone and a single mom to seven kids from college-aged down to just four years old.
In the difficult months that followed, Lisa remembers the powerful presence of friends and prayer holding her family up.
“I do remember thinking and knowing that we were being carried by prayer.”
Yet, as you listen to our interview, you’ll hear the incredible hope that Lisa share about the blessings and abundance of God. She talks about the pain of walking with her kids through the loss of their dad and the practical ways that she helped her kids open up and talk about their fears and loss.
During this episode, Lisa encourages us to remember:
- Grief comes in many forms and we don’t get over it, but we do learn to “live where we are”;
- We learn to live with the love, but without the person;
- God has as much abundance planned for us AFTER our loss as before our loss.
SHARE YOUR EXPERIENCE IN THE COMMENTS BELOW: Is there a place in your life affected by grief? Have you lost a loved one, a dream, or a relationship? How are you dealing with your grief and what resources do you find most helpful in the grieving process?
CONNECT WITH LISA:
Lisa’ website | Twitter | Instagram | Facebook
100 Days with Christ Bible Study Journal and Reading Plan
FIND OUT MORE ABOUT FINDING JOY LADIES NIGHT OUT EVENT! Click here for more details!
by Barb Roose | Feb 21, 2018 | Better Together Podcast
“I read Bill’s words as he confessed that he had lied to his family and had stolen, and spent, $1,000,000 from his aunt’s trust fund. It was obvious he confessed at trial to get a reduced sentence. I was numb and in shock. I had asked God for the total truth but had never dreamed that the truth would be so painful.
How could my husband and best friend, who I had known since I was five, be a liar, a thief , and a convicted felon? It was excruciating.” -from Lynn’s Story: A Journey of searing, Inspiring Growth and Ultimate Healing
For over 30 years, former corporate trainer Lynn Kampfer lived what most people would consider the American Dream. Married to her childhood sweetheart and raising two kids, Lynn and her family enjoyed the best that life had to offer.
Yet, as Lynn began to search for God the outer edges of her lovely life began to crack and crumble. In this episode of the Better Together podcast, Lynn shares not only her dramatic story but more importantly, incredible lessons learned about God’s faithfulness, provision, forgiveness, and hope. Lynn will definitely inspire you as she shares about surviving breath-taking heartache and how to thrive even as life takes an unwelcome left turn.
As you listen to today’s podcast, I want you to draw hope and encouragement from Lynn’s story especially if you feel like your life is falling apart.
What you’ll hear from today’s podcast:
- How God plants seeds in our lives, even when we’re unaware;
- Even after rock bottom, things can always get worse;
- When you don’t forgive, you’re in a prison doing hard time with the person who hurt you;
- Two important things to know and do when beginning the journey toward forgiveness;
- How God never abandons us when the unthinkable in life actually happens.
Forgiveness is a difficult and often misunderstood concept.
There’s not enough space in this post to properly cover the topic, but I hope that you listen to Lynn’s podcast because you can learn a lot from her journey to forgiveness. It wasn’t easy, but she is so wise in how she journeyed through it.
POST A COMMENT BELOW: Can you tell us about your forgiveness journey? What was hard? How did God help you? If you’re still struggling, how can we pray for you?
by Barb Roose | Feb 12, 2018 | Joshua & Winning the Worry Battle
by Barb Roose
One Sunday afternoon I received a Facebook message from someone asking for help.
This sweet lady, whom I’ll call Leah, lost her father recently. If you’ve lost a parent or any loved one, you know that the grief runs deep. Dealing with the grief requires time, rest, and lots of self-care. Yet, she was unable to care for herself because others had pushed the worries and cares in their lives from their life onto her.
Leah was overwhelmed, except the worries weren’t her own. She was drowning in the worries of loved ones around her. I’ve known Leah almost my entire life. She manages her personal affairs well and plans for the future. Yet, she felt ensnared because of her fear of uncertainty and worries about her adult children. One was experiencing a second, unplanned pregnancy and another had neglected taking care of some serious legal issues and was looking at jail time. Leah told me that she promised money, time, and energy to help her loved ones get through their situation. But she also admitted that this cycle of being stressed out and bailing out had been going on for years. In fact, before Leah’s father passed away, he gently warned Leah that taking on other people’s problems would destroy her. He was right.
I diagnosed Leah’s condition as “Secondhand Worry.”
You might be suffering from Secondhand Worry if someone tells you about his or her problems and then, you end up suffering physical and emotional worry symptoms. Another symptom of Secondhand Worry is when worry drives you to assume responsibility for someone else’s problem. (If you’re familiar with recovery principles, that kind of Secondhand Worry is worry-driven enabling.)
Here are some practical examples:
• Your spouse has trouble with a manager, and you begin to worry about his job loss.
• Your child struggles with a subject at school, you worry that he or she will end up living on your couch well into their adult years.
The problem with Secondhand Worry is that we experience all of the symptoms associated with worry like sleepless nights, stressed out feeling, lack of appetite or overeating, frayed nerves BUT the situation isn’t even about us.
If you can relate to Leah, it’s a difficult place to be. Life is hard enough trying to fight in faith for our own victory over worry. It’s not possible for us to fight someone else’s battle, too.
For the past few months, I’ve been studying Old Testament book of Joshua and there is a situation where Joshua ends up with a case of secondhand worry. God prohibited the Israelites from making treaties with the inhabitants of Canaan, yet Joshua and the leaders were snookered by a group of Gibeonites with a fictitious story and some deceptive visual aides (Joshua 9:9-13). Instead of consulting God for wisdom, Joshua and the leaders made a treaty with the lying Gibeonites, whose deception was driven by fear. As a result, the Israelites ended up being responsible for a group of people that God warned them against.
Are you feeling responsible for people in your life who should be responsible for themselves? Do they keep coming back to you over and over again with endless excuses and sad stories?
If you’ve been caught in Secondhand Worry, you know what it’s like to hemorrhage money or spend sleepless nights because someone in your life didn’t manage his or her business. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, don’t let someone else’s worry wear you out!
Years ago, my friend and licensed therapist Tim challenged me to admit that I was struggling with Secondhand Worry. In fact, we had a few heated sessions because I told him that he just didn’t understand! What if I didn’t intervene and something horrible happened? Then, Tim made this powerful statement: We have to let the people in our lives discover their own need for God.
Is there someone in your life that you love, but you realize that it’s time to step back and let them discover their need for God?
It’s not my role to advise you not to help, but realize that your helping has the potential to hurt both of you. It’s hurting them because instead of allowing their consequences to push them toward God, you might be putting yourself in the way. It’s hurting you because you’re carrying a heavy load of someone else’s mess. Perhaps the person will see God more clearly once you get out of the way…
I recognize that the answers to the questions of how to handle your situation might be complex. No doubt there will be emotions involved. That is why prayer is so important. When you pray, God’s wisdom can cut through your emotions and deliver clarity. Furthermore, in prayer, God’s Holy Spirit may reveal or remind you of something that wasn’t present during your conversation with that person.
If you determine that it would not be healthy to aid someone, saying “no” is difficult, but you’ve got to do it — both for their sake and yours! Here are a few things that you can say instead:
- I’m so sorry about your situation, but I am unable to help you at this time.
- That is so difficult! Can I help you put together a plan that you can use to deal with this situation? (Only if you can plan without taking responsibility!)
- I know that you can figure this out. Keep me posted on how you are doing.
It feels bad saying “no” to helping someone, but remember, you aren’t saying that they aren’t worthy of help, only that you are no longer getting in the way of God helping them.
SHARE A COMMENT BELOW: What’s the hardest part about stepping back and letting your loved ones and friends take care of their own problems?
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by Barb Roose | Feb 7, 2018 | Better Together Podcast
Are you tired of cleaning up the same messes day after day? Are you tired of making dinner, changing diapers or driving carpool day after day?
If you answered “yes” to any of those questions, you aren’t alone! In fact, you’re invited into a guilt-free zone for a precious conversation today about embracing God’s grace in the messiness of motherhood.
On this episode of the Better Together podcast, my guest is speaker and author, Amy Seiffert. She’s the author of the new book, Chin Up: Wearing Grace, Strength and Dignity When Motherhood Unravels Our Soul. Amy and her husband, Rob live in NW Ohio and they are the parents of three kids. For the past 16 years, Amy has been writing and speaking on staff with Cru and she’s the Director of Outward Movement at Brookside Church in Bowling Green, OH. 
Before she became a mom, Amy pictured motherhood as a beautiful dress that she saw her friends wearing so beautifully. However, Amy felt that her motherhood dress felt floppy and didn’t fit quite right. She says that every time she tried to adjust or change, her motherhood dress would shift and expose the things that she wanted to keep covered up.
Amy and I talk about how she found God’s grace in the mundane and maddening tasks of motherhood. If you’ve ever struggled with endless laundry, Mom, I’m hungry, hated playing Barbies or was tempted to burn your kids’ puzzles, Amy’s been there.
One of the most powerful parts of our conversation centered around changing our perspective on the endless loads of laundry or those long sleepless nights. I love how Amy’s former seminar professor calls those seemingly mundane tasks “maintaining and sustaining.” In her book, Amy writes that when we see the sunrise and sunset or the seasons change, those are examples of how God maintains and sustains our world. Amy was encouraged when she realized that her maintaining and sustaining tasks like laundry, making dinner and changing diapers mirrored God’s work in our world. I hope that you listen in for that powerful conversation.
As we talk about Chin Up, Amy shares her struggle to overcome anger, letting go of unrealistic expectations and most of all, how she’s learning to embrace God’s grace in motherhood., if you’ve been beating yourself up for not being the kind of mom that you want to be or think that you should be, Amy’s story is you’ve been beating yourself up for not being the kind of mom that you want to be or think that you should be, Amy’s story is
Sweet friend, if you’ve been beating yourself up for not being the kind of mom that you want to be or feeling guilty about not always enjoying motherhood, Amy’s story is perfect encouragement for you.
SHARE A COMMENT! What are your favorite “mom” moments with your kids?
PODCAST SHOW LINKS:
Amy Seiffert’s website
Connect with Amy on Facebook
Buy Chin Up on Amazon.com
Barb Roose is the host of the Better Together podcast. Barb is passionate about reaching women and teaching them to win at life with God-empowered strength and dignity. She loves speaking at women’s conferences and events on the topics of fear and worry, self-care and leadership. Barb is the author of multiple books and Bible studies, including April 2018 releases, Winning the Worry Battle (book) and Joshua: Winning the Worry Battle (Bible study). Check out Barbroose.com for more information.
Check out this episode!
by Barb Roose | Jan 31, 2018 | Better Together Podcast
Who taught you about sex as a child? If you’re a parent, how do you feel about talking to your child about sex?
According to a survey conducted by Knowledge Networks, 57% of parents feel uncomfortable talking to their kids about sex and 64% reported that their parents didn’t do a good job talking to them. How do we engage in this important conversation with our kids with confidence as well as effectiveness?
On this episode of the Better Together Podcast, I’m talking Lauren Snyder, Executive Director of Ministry at CedarCreek Church in Perrysburg, OH. Join our conversation as we have a conversation about a topic that we hate talking to our kids about: SEX.
During this podcast, you hear and learn:
- A fun story about the unconventional way that Lauren learned about the birds-and-the-bees;
- Why parents must be the first and primary voice in their children’s life regarding sex;
- Lauren will equip you with phrases that we need to repeat early and often to our kids to keep them from developing body-related or sex-related shame.
During our podcast, Lauren also named a few of the resources that she provided to Lydia. We’ve also included those links for you:
As Lauren recommends, please read these resources before handing them off to your kids. You’ll want to be aware and equipped to receive the questions that your child might ask, rather than scrambling to do damage control or untwist any misconceptions.
What if you’re afraid to teach your kids about sex because you feel ashamed or guilty about your past?
Romans 8:1 says that there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. If God has forgiven you, then you need to let His forgiveness in to clear your heart and mind and not block it with your guilt, shame or self-hatred. If you don’t accept God’s forgiveness, you’ll miss an opportunity to testify to your kids about how God forgives and how we can be set free from guilt and shame.
What if you don’t know what the Bible says about sex?
This is a common question. There are a lot of people who are confused about what the Bible does and doesn’t teach about sex. Now, there are an endless list of resources and perspectives. Here is a “starter” list for adults who want to learn more. You’re welcome to share your suggestion on the blog page.
SHARE YOUR FEEDBACK! How taught you about sex? If you are a parent, how did you teach your daughters about sex? Are there any resources that you’d recommend?
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by Barb Roose | Jan 24, 2018 | Better Together Podcast, Women's Topics
I grew up in a family of fabulous singers. But, I am not one of them…
My grandmother traveled with a gospel choir and played as the church pianist for at least 20 years. I grew up watching my mom and aunts sing, too. Their voices are powerful, beautiful and amazing.. They can blow! If we’re friends on social media, you’ve seen photos of my sister, Tonya, who is an opera singer. Watching to her perform always bring a smile to my face that lasts far after her performance is over.
You might be wondering if I can sing. The answer is…meh.
If you happen to pull your car up next to mine in traffic, I guarantee that I’m singing in the car. I am an awesome car singer. The acoustics are wonderful for my marginal vocal ability. If I turn up the radio high enough, I sound exactly like the vocalists in the song. If I turn off the radio and keep singing, just be happy that my windows are up.
In my 20’s I struggled with my less-than-super singing. Since I was from a singing family, having an okay singing voice wasn’t good enough when everyone around me sounded so great.
To increase my confidence, I took voice lessons in my mid-20’s. I felt better when I sang on my ensemble church worship team. But as soon as I had to sing on my own, my confidence faltered and my voice always fell flat. I often wanted to run off the stage and hide. Oh, how I used to beat myself up! Why couldn’t I keep my confidence?
Do you ever struggle with your confidence?
I love it when women tell me their dreams. Some women desire certain job or career title. I get frequent emails from women who want to write or speak. Having a dream is a good thing! But, what do you do when you dream is undermined by your lack of confidence? Some of us have a Debbie Downer living in the dirty corner of our mind telling us things like:
“You don’t belong…”
“She’s more talented than you…”
“Why do you think that you’re special…”
“If you fail, everyone will laugh…”
Six Words to Say to Yourself
Yesterday, I finished Lynn Cowell’s new Bible study, Make Your Move: Finding Unshakeable Confidence Despite Your Fears and Failures. Lynn is a speaker and author who writes and speaks to equip mothers with wisdom so that those mamas can raise wiser daughters. Her six-week Bible study featured weekly profiles of six groups of women in the Bible and lessons in Christ-Courage and confidence, like Shiprah and Puah, the two Hebrew women who refused to follow the Pharoah’s order to kill infants like Moses.
One of my favorite moments was studying Deborah, one of Israel’s judges. Not only was she assigned to be God’s spokesperson to Israel, but she’d received a gigantic assignment: to instruct the Israelites during battle. Just to be clear, Deborah was a judge, not a warrior. But, she went because that is what God called her to do.
As I studied her story a few weeks ago, I was pushing to finish my new book, Winning the Worry Battle. It’s been a tough few months writing back-to-back projects, losing my dad, traveling and then moving through the editing process. For the first few weeks of January, I felt like I was fisting-fighting the Debbie Downer in my mind because I was mentally worn out from the past few months of life. What if you flake out and don’t finish? What if your writing isn’t any good? What if no one buys it?
But, as I studied Deborah, she speaks six words that immediately refilled my soul.
In Judges 5, Deborah and Barak sing a song of victory after winning the battle. As they sing over defeating their enemies, Deborah slips in six powerful words. They are tucked into verse 21:
The Kishon River swept them away—
that ancient torrent, the Kishon.
March on with courage, my soul!.
– Judges 5:21
Did you see those precious words: “March on with courage, my soul!”?
I’ve read, remembered and breathed those words at least a hundred times in the past three weeks. There’s are two powerful lessons for us to remember when we’re under pressure and questioning whether we can actually do what God’s called us to do.
First, Deborah knew how to encourage herself when she needed it. Her encouragement fueled her confidence.
Second, if we trust and know what God has called us to do, let’s stop undermining our confidence while we’re doing it.
How can you encourage yourself today?
- Do I even need to say this? Stop calling yourself names like stupid, idiot, worthless or loser! Those names are not helpful and they will hurt your confidence. As I wrote in my Enough Already book, “Beating yourself up won’t change a thing!”
- Learn how to become a rock star at encouraging yourself. Encouraging yourself is not prideful! The Bible is filled with proclamations of God’s everlasting love for us. Even when we mess up, God loves us. Whispering phrases like, “I made a mistake, but I’m not a mistake,” “I can keep going because God will help me” and “I am not alone, God is with me” – these are how we keep our confidence. Can you start saying these phrases to yourself?
So, how does my story end?
After a few years of constant confidence struggles, I finally stopped singing. I’d taken a temporary break to give birth to my now 17-year daughter. By the time I was ready to begin serving at church again, the music team had re-organized and I found a new ministry where God began to lay the foundation for the work that He’s given me to do today.
Once I began following my natural gifts and talents, I found peace. Not only that, but I could learn and grow with so much freedom. Confidence came from being who God called me to be! I love Lynn’s words in the study. She writes, “We each have different gifts, talents and callings. I am simply a woman doing the assignments God gives to me.
Whatever God has called you to do in this season of life matters, my friend. You don’t need to compare yourself to what the women around you are doing because you’ve got your own amazing work to do. Whether you’re raising your children, working your 9-5 or caring for your parents, confidence comes from knowing that you’re doing the best at what God calls you to do.
Creating a conversation around Christ-confidence is such a vital discussion. Check out Lynn’s Bible study by clicking here. You can also listen to my recent podcast with Lynn by clicking the audio player below:
SHARE YOUR STORY: What are some of the lessons that you’ve learned about being a confident woman?
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